You jokes
What's the difference between a road bump and children crossing the road?
A road bump will make you slow down when you drive over it.
What does the man cheeseburger say to the girl cheeseburger?
“You got nice buns!”
What did the teacher say to the fat Turkish kid that always ate in his class?
"You could do with Ramadan lasting all year, couldn't you?"
Hi 👋 I love you!
What do you say when you wake up to the police trying to arrest you?
“C'mon, did ya really think I’d resist arrest?”
I did a walk today and I had to walk home from school and walk walk home from school and walk walk home from home and walk walk home and I had a good time with you and walk home from home and walk walk home and I had to.
What do you call dogs dressed as dinosaurs?
Jurassic Bark!
Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?
Because she’ll let it goo!
What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter?
An irrel-elephant ;)
Did you hear about the guy that was cutting off people's feet and taking them?
It took my sole.
What do you call vampire Matt Damon?
Bat Damon!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Robin.
Robin who?
Robin you, that is who.
What do you call a band made of cheese?
Grate That!
Q. You know what really bugs me?
A. Insect puns.
What does a stick say when it falls down? "Wood you help me up?"
Someone asked me what the worst mistake you could make while being at work was, and I replied, "Being a doctor and mixing up the oral and rectal thermometers."
What would you call a person who hides in a house for 24 hours and then kills them?
Morgz.
How do you find Will Smith in the snow?
You look for the fresh prints.
What did Yoda say to Luke during his wedding ceremony?
"May divorce be with you."
Why can’t you tell a funny joke to a wheelchair kid? Because he just rolls with the joke.