You jokes
What do you call an orphan who became a priest?
Father-less.
What do you call a black coconut?
A CoonConut.
I wasn’t understanding what I had to do for homework, so my teacher said, “Let me break it down for you like the Twin Towers.”
Do you want to hear a joke about the blunt pencil? Never mind, it's pointless.
What do you call your daughter's boyfriend when he brings her back past 10pm?
An ambulance.
Do you have a sunburn, or are you just always this hot?
What do you call a redneck on fire?
A fire cracker.
What’s the difference between you and Jesus? We know who Jesus’s dad was.
How do you clean ash off a stove with chemicals?
What is the difference between a guitar and a fish?
You can't tuna fish.
- What do you call a bee who flew to United States? - "USB"
What do you call a German lesbian?
A krautmuncher.
You wanna hear an Indian egg joke? (yeah-)
Never mind. You won't understand.
You are American when you walk to the bathroom. What are you when you are in there?
You're-a-peein'. European.
What did the banana say to the vibrator?
"Why are you shaking? She’s gonna eat me!"
So, I had an orphan friend, and he asked me, "How's your girlfriend?" I said, "I don't have one." He said, "I know, I just wanted to remind you." Then I asked, "How are your parents?" After that, I never saw him again.
Why can you hit orphans?
Because they can't tell their parents.
What do lesbian vampires say after sex?
"See you next month."
Did you hear about the mad who got his whole left side cut off? He's all right now.
Nasruddin Hodja was tilling his patch of land when a hunter came riding up.
“Hey, you!" said the man. “Did you see a boar run past?"
“Yes," replied Hodja.
“Which way did it go?" demanded the man.
Hodja pointed in the direction in which the boar had gone.
The man rode away without a word of thanks, but he was back within minutes.
“No sign of it!" he said. “Are you sure it went that way?"
“I am certain," replied Hodja. “It went that way. Two years ago."