You jokes
What do Viagra and Disneyland have in common?
They both cause you to stand around for an hour waiting for a two-minute ride.
What song do you play at an emo kid's funeral?
Van Halen's "Jump."
Why should you never make height jokes about dwarfs?
It goes right over their head.
Why aren’t short people allowed to be mentors?
Because you can’t look up to them.
What do you call five Black people having sex?
Threesome.
Shep
Are you a haunted house? Because I’m going to scream when I’m in you! 😫
Did you make your bed this morning? Wanna unmake it together?
What do you call it when school starts in Africa?
Black to school.
What do you call a nun on a wheelchair?
Virgin Mobile.
Why do lesbians shop at Sports Authority? Because they don’t like dicks.
How do you get a white girl to suck your dick?
Put ranch dressing on it.
My 19-year-old girl killed a butterfly. I said no butter for you.
She then she killed a cockroach. I told her nice try.
Are you a blanket? Because I love it when you’re on top of me.
I hope you remembered my name since you’ll be screaming it later.
Cop: "I'm arresting you for downloading the entire Wikipedia."
Man: "Wait! I can explain everything!"
How do you know when a fat person stops eating? You read about it in the obituary.
Why should you keep English gay activists away from neo-nazis?
British cigarettes get smoked easily.
What is the difference between a cow and 9/11?
You can’t milk a cow for 15 years.
Why can’t you take a Black Asian guy golfing? Because he can’t drive and can’t find his own balls.
Are you a mental hospital? Cause I need to be in you.