You jokes

Hairline

(Bully) Boy, you ugly!

(Me) Boy, shut up, that's why your hairline start at the back of your head.

Nine

Roses are red, Violets are fine, You can be the six, And I can be the nine.

Man

Did you see that Chinese man with no legs?

No, I'm blind.

Stop ruining my jokes.

Isn't that the Chinese man with no legs' fault?

It's not like He Go Ann Hi Weh.

Memes

Schizophrenic

Girlfriend: "Would you still love me if I was a figment of your imagination?"

My schizophrenic ass: Of course I would.

World

You are able to travel to the anime world, believe me, Michael Jackson did it.

Basement

Kid: *runs down the street* HELP ME!

Officer: You OK, kid?

Me: Don't worry! He's my nephew, there was a big spider.

Officer: Oh, OK, ma'am. *walks off*

When officer leaves:

Me: *gets whip* What did I say about leaving the basement?

Priest

A priest says to me, "Come up, my child." Then I said, "Do I know you? Because you're not my father."

Rope

How do you get a depressed kid out of a tree? You cut the rope.

Panera

Ok guys, I have one last joke (for now).

What do you call it when Panera is over?

Panera end.

Income

According to unofficial sources, a new simplified income-tax form consists of only four lines:

1. What was your income for the year?

2. What were your expenses?

3. How much have you left?

4. Send it in.

Emo

I asked my friend how long I can be in the sky. He said if you are emo, then forever.

Earth

I'm no astronomer, but I’m pretty sure the Earth revolves around the sun... not you.

Quitter

Just because you‘re suicidal, you don‘t have to be a quitter.

Wait, actually.

Stool

Q: How do you fit 4 gay men on a bar stool?

A: Flip the chair upside down.