So, one day a teacher asked, "How many of you have thought of committing suicide?" Half of the class raised their hand, but the teacher said, "Where are Jesse and John?"
You Jokes
Crack me, break me, love me, and you ate me--egg.
What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals?
Philipe Philope.
If you have a teacher who is a Karen, comment what the worst thing that they did to you or your entire class. I know this isn’t a joke, but why not?
Are you my fish? Because you're supposed to be dead.
What does a mother fear most?
Hearing "YOU ARE NOT THE FATHER!" for 5 different men.
"When your mom is pregnant and your best friend learns dad jokes."
Me:.....
Your forehead is so big, you can fit Santa’s sack on it.
How do you get a depressed person out of a tree?
You cut the rope.
Are you sad? Then don't be sad, because sad backwards is das, and das no good.
Q: What do you call a boomerang that is not coming back? A: A stick.
Your forehead is so big you can smoke a cigar in the rain.
What do you call two Mexicans playing ping pong? Juan on Juan.
What do you call a white man sandwiched between two black men in a blue sleeping bag?
An Oreo.
Your forehead is so big even Mega Mind knew you were smarter.
The quiet kid's dad dies. You go, "Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Not your dad."
Then he says, "What comes after 47?"
The quiet kid says, "AK."
When somebody says they're depressed (by over-romanticizing their so-called problems) but can't be by your side when you are at your lowest.
Then you know they're faking depression. 🙂
If you know it, you know it.
What's the difference between a nuclear reactor and your step sis? You need to use protection for the nuclear reactor.
What do you call a smart pig?
A Swinestein.
What happens to grapes when you step on them? They wine.
