You jokes
What do you call a down syndrome person that was hit by a car?
Mash potato.
What do you call a burning church?
Holy smokes.
What do you call a blind German?
A not see.
How do you make a plumber sad?
Kill his family.
What do you call a private nun?
Nun-o-yo-business.
Memes
What do you do after your girlfriend with two broken legs dumps you?
Take her wheelchair, she'll come crawling back.
When I was teaching my dog tricks, a Chinese man came to me and asked, "Why were you playing with your food?"
What do you call an angry Texan?
A Confederate leader.
What do you call a midget with autism?
A weetard.
If you want to pick on someone, pick on orphans. Let them tell their parents.
Double!
Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere!
Triple!
Why did Bob cross the road? Because he wasn't wearing his seatbelt.
No means no, but if you use chloroform, it’s a guaranteed yes.
How do you avoid getting raped? Just don't say no!
Leave a like if you like sex and porn, and talk to me if you have any questions.
Like this if you are a single Pringle like me.
A kid asks his mom, "Mom, how much do you love me?" The mother responds with, "I love you as much as I love your brother." The kid looks confused and says, "But I don't have a brother." The mother smiles and says, "Well, I guess my love is not existing."
God said, "Let there be light." Chuck Norris said, "You have to say please first."
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.
Did you hear about the boy who got raped by a group of women in the park whilst jogging? Now there are lots of male joggers in the area.
Me: *Meets girl, starts to form crush* Me after I get enough courage to talk to her: “Are you a casket lid because I want you on top of me?”
“What do you call my friend group?” “Suicide Squad.”
Guess what song this is from:
"I'll cut you into little bitty pieces,
Or freeze you till your blood runs cold,
Or stab your till' you heart stops pumping.
I'm here to realize your wish from what I'm told."