You jokes

¡Hola, soy Dora!

Can you help me find the two fucks I'm supposed to give?!

You're so trash that when I dropped you off, I got a ticket for littering.

Dad: Come on, David, go dress up like a girl.

David: Isn't that illegal?

Dad: Nah, it isn't illegal if you keep the buttons in.

David: I hate my life.

What do you call a rapper who's always sleepy?

NAP-TAIN

What do you say when an emo cuts themself?

"Like your cut, G."

This joke is kinda offensive, but here you go.

What’s the longest joke of the year? Pride month.

Me explaining to the school nurse that ice can't cure everything.

Nurse: hOW DaRe yOu OpPosE mE mORtAl!

A friend of mine told me this joke a long time ago and I have never forgotten it.

A worm was crawling over a train track, and a train ran over him and cut off his ass. The worm turned around to get the piece of his ass back and another train ran over him and cut off his head.

BAD IDEA and a lesson to us all.

NEVER LOSE YOUR HEAD OVER A PIECE OF ASS!! LMAO (literally, kind of)( pretty sure you get it)

What did the letter A say to the letter B?

"Z" you later.

Daddy, I really miss you. Mummy changed my name to Tickle Timpson. Anyway, daddy I forgive you for abusing me.

I will never forget the moment when my father saw me masturbating. He said, "Son, what are you doing? I'm on a video conference - get out of my office!"

How do you know if an Asian is an orphan?

If their grade was only an A.

I would like to tell you the name of a song I showed to my friend who had an overdose of LSD.

I see a dreamer.

Dear Gwen and Prince,

Gwen and Prince, sorry for being mean and cussing and other messed up nonsense. To be honest, I really just wanted to be your friends, all both of you! BTW Prince, Gwen is not dating Aiden...I don't even know who Aiden is! Sorry a million times, Zreina.

Yo mama so dumb, she thought "The Squid Game" was an all-you-can-eat buffet.

Your mom shat you out after having Taco Bell. That’s why she calls you a little shat.

Me: Hi Jacob!

Jacob: Hi.

Me: Your parents went to jail for littering when you were born!

Jacob: GOO GOO GAH GAH

I felt bad for the orphan because he couldn't go on a field trip, you know why?

Parent signature: _________

What do you say when you wake up to the police trying to arrest you?

“C'mon, did ya really think I’d resist arrest?”

You're so poor you put paper cutlery in the dishwasher.