You jokes
What do you call a hungry person?
African.
America is filled with MAYO MONKEYS (you could make a mayo sandwich!).
My friend's 4-year-old daughter made up this joke.
What kind of poo should you put in your hair?
Shampoo.
Were you born on a highway? Because that is where most mistakes happen.
Like if you are emo.
Memes
You're so skinny you use floss to wipe your butt.
A: Do you eat food?
B: Yes...
A: You can sit on deez nuts then!
B: Omg I have depression now.
Sorry.
Why are you sorry?
Sorry for putting deez nuts in your mouth.
Did you hear about the mathematician who's afraid of negative numbers?
He'll stop at nothing to avoid them.
Your mom is so ugly, you look like her. Oh, got 'em!
What do you call a wheelchair kid that is on fire?
Hot Wheels.
Say, "Hey, you're pretty." Then she'll say, "OMG, thank you so much," or something cringe. Then you say, "Pretty f***ing ugly, aha, gottie!"
You suck.
When you look exactly like your dead cousin and everybody thinks she faked her death.
FUCKING MENT
What is a part of a vegetable you can't eat?
The wheelchair.
Jack and Jill went up a hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high and touched her thigh and said, "Do you wanna?" Jill said yes and pulled up her dress and they had some fun.
But silly Jill forgot her pills, and so they had a son.
What do you call a kid in a wheelchair going through a fire? Ghost Rider.
It says in the Bible to only think about what’s pure and lovely... So I’ve been thinking about you all day long.
This will happen in your future, though, now because you're mean.
What do you call a redhead in a fridge?
I'm pretty sure her name was Kelly.