Why jokes

Why didn't the butcher cut the fillet?

Because it was a misteak.

Why were the cherries 🍒 crying?

Because their parents were in a jam.

Why was the giraffe late to work?

Because it got caught in a giraffic jam.

Person 1: Why did you put the baby feet first into the blender?

Person 2: To see his facial expression. Why else?

Your mum so fat that when she sat down she said, "Why are there so many people under me?"

Why do hackers in Africa have hard times dealing with firewalls?

They don't have water.

Q: Why does Helen Keller masturbate with only one hand?

A: She moans with the other.

Why do women always have sex with the lights off?

Because they never like to see a man having a good time.

Q: Why are gay people never late for their flight?

A: They get their shit packed the night before.

Question: Why did the Mexican push his wife off a cliff?

Answer: Tequila

Why can't America play chess?

They're missing two towers.

Why does the Sun go to school?

To get brighter!

Your life literally is as valuable as a summer ant. I'm just gonna stomp you, you're gonna keep coming back, I'm gonna seal up all my cracks, you're gonna keep coming back, why? Cause you keep smelling the syrup, you worthless bitchass nlgga! You're gonna stay on my dick until you die. You serve no purpose in life, your purpose in life is to be on my stream sucking on my dick daily. Your purpose in life is to be in that chat blowing a dick daily. Your life is nothing, you serve ZERO purpose. You should kill yourself, NOW! And give somebody else a piece of that oxygen and ozone layer that's covered up so we can breathe inside this blue trapped bubble. Cause what are you here for? To worship me? Kill yourself! I mean that with a hundred percent with a thousand percent.

A man finds his son climbing the roof of his house. The kid kept using all sorts of material to climb up, but the dad didn't pay much attention.

Next day the kid went to the state tower and kept climbing using some adhesive gloves. The dad asks his son for a second time: "Son! Why are you doing this?" The son replies: "You told me to aim up high!"

What is a kind thing to say to someone and what is a rude thing to say to someone?

Kind thing to say to someone: You are the most perfect you there is. Your outlook on life is amaz- (BLAH, BLAH, BLAH ENOUGH!)

Rudist thing to say too someone: You more uglyer than my mama's boyfriend. You are a son of a b word! Okay that is so much rude and why you can say that to a tree but anyway not the point. Bonus: The world's most weirdest name to say to a girl, is Nutter butter, we know that's a weird *and* stupid name because she is not nutter or butter she is a person not a thing! Oh well bye!!!!

Why do men have penises?

They gotta shut women up somehow.

Why don't the Amish water ski?

The horses would drown.

A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team's bench.

After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience. "Oh, I really liked it," she replied, "especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents."

Dumbfounded, her date asked, "What do you mean?"

"Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it, and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, 'Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!' I'm like, hello? It's only 25 cents!"

Why can't Jesus eat M&Ms?

Because they keep falling through the holes in his hands.

Three men were in a desert. One man was holding a jug, the 2nd was holding a paper bag, and the last was holding a car door. A man came around and asked the 1st why he had a jug. He said it was his water and if he got thirsty, he would take a drink.

Then he asked the second why do you have a paper bag? The guy said this is my packed lunch, so if I get hungry, I will eat my lunch.

Then he asked the last man why he has a car door and he said if he got hot he would roll down the window.