Why jokes
Why Cristiano Ronaldo loves oranges??
Because they contain vitamin suiiiii!
A woman goes to buy a parrot.
There is one for 200, 500, and one for 15 bucks.
She asks why the last one is so cheap.
The man at the counter says, "It used to live in a brothel/sex house."
The lady buys it anyway.
When she gets home, it says, "Fuck me, a new brothel!"
When her daughters get home, it says, "Fuck me, 2 new prozzies!"
When the father gets home, the parrot says, "Fuck me, Daryl, haven't seen you in the brothel in weeks!"
Why are basketball courts slippery?
Because the players dribble on it.
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Most likely because they can't find home.
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they can’t get a home run.
Why did the terrorist not get paid, but they loved their job?
They di2s drying plans.
Why can’t the baby cross the road?
Walls.
Why do emos cut themselves?
To play noughts and crosses.
Why don't pirates take a bath before walking the plank?
'Cause they just wash up onshore.
Why did the man say "hi" to say "bye?"
Guy: "Can I tell you a joke?"
Spiderman: "Yes."
Guy: "You only have 11 months on your calendar."
Spiderman: "Why?"
Guy: *holds up knife* "Because I murdered May."
Why can’t orphans play baseball? They have got no home to run to.
Why are batteries quicker than Stephen Hawking?
Because they can run out.
Why did the hedgehog cross the road?
To see his flat-mate.
I was digging a hole in the garden when I found some gold coins.
I was about to run and tell my wife when I remembered why I was digging a hole in the garden...
I asked my uncle why he was living on the streets.
He said that he wasn't always on the streets, he used to have a job at these two towers. I asked him what happened, and he said two planes happened.
Why did Sally fail her final exam?
Because she had nothing written down.
Why did the rapper go to school?
To learn his ABCs (All 'Bout Cash)!
Why did the gorilla leave the mafia headquarters for good?
Why did the chicken cross the rooooo o oooad?