Whos Jokes

What do you call a person who cares for chickens?

A chicken tender.

My grandma used to beat the hell out of me for coming home late. Guess who's late now?

There is a kid in my class who is allergic to peanuts. He says he's gay. He can't be though... he's allergic to nuts!

A middle schooler and his dad were at a drugstore. The boy picked up a pack of 3 condoms and asked his dad who they were for. The dad said, "They're for high schoolers: 1 for Friday, 1 for Saturday, and 1 for Sunday." The boy then picked up a 6 pack of condoms and asked his dad who they were for. The dad said, "They're for college students: 2 for Friday, 2 for Saturday, and 2 for Sunday." The kid then picked up a pack of 12 condoms and asked his dad who they were for. The dad said, "They're for married men: 1 for January, 1 for February..."

RIP Stephen Hawking who was buried today... he did always love black holes.

The image contains a definition of the term semibisexual, followed by a dialogue between two guys in a gay bar. The text ends with the phrase "Well that just sounds like straight with extra steps" and the image shows a scene from the show Rick and Morty.

I have a friend who has no arms, her name is Suzy. I always tell her this one knock knock joke, "Knock Knock!" "Who's there?" Not Suzy.

Ice cream truck drivers are the most sus people on earth. They’re adults who play children’s music and give ice cream to kids who approach their van.

Have you heard about the pedophile who was guilty of robbery?

He took a girl's innocence.

There was once a man from Peru. Who fell asleep in a canoe. While dreaming of Venus, He played with his penis, And awoke with a hand full of goo.

Who is not allowed to watch PG movies?

Orphans.

God: Who ever kills Hitler will go to heaven.

Hitler: 👌👌👌👌

God: 😩😩😩😩

add me in Roblox wholetthedogsoutyou1 lol who let the dogs out you you you you you?

I went to a stand up show with the person who made my life a joke.

One day at school, I made fun of a girl who lost her hair from cancer, and my parents made me shave my head.

The next day at school, I made fun of an orphan.

An emo girl and a squirrel both fall out of a tree. Who hits the ground first? The squirrel. The rope stops the emo girl.

Knock knock. Who's there? Depression. Depression who? Depression you!

Why did Susie fall off the swing?

She had no arms.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Not Susie.

I was on a bus when this girl offered to blow me for $5.

...and never being a person to pass up a good deal, I gave her $5 and watched her do her thing. After she was finished she lit up a cigarette and started smoking right there on the bus.

I was disgusted. I thought to myself, "What is this world coming to? Who sells cigarettes to a 12 year old?"