When jokes
Don't you just hate it when your grandmas always complaining about things getting stuck between her false teeth, like my foreskin?
How did Santa feel when he got stuck in the chimney?
Claus-trophobic.
For some reason, when my mom eats hot dogs, she likes to lick and suck on it first. As a son, can anyone tell me why?
Your mom is so fat that when she went on the scale, it said, "I need your weight, not your phone number!"
So, a man finds a woman on a train track while he's on his way to a bar, and they had a lot of sex.
When he gets to the bar, he brags about the different sex positions they used, and one of the guys says, "Oh, did you do head?"
He responded with, "No, I couldn't find the head."
Fnaf (when C.C got his head bit and survived) him at age 20
Q: What do you get when you cross Viagra and Donald Trump?
A: Erection fraud. (Just a joke.)
I bet emos get jealous when their phone dies.
Q: What did the porn actress say when she opened the door?
A: Make sure to come upstairs!
Yo mama's so dumb, she waited until the stop sign turned blue.
Yo mama's so fat, when she got pregnant, she fell to the earth's core.
Roses are red, balls are round, skirts are up, panties are down, belly to belly, skin to skin, when it's stiff, stick it in.
Your hairline goes back to when your dad left you.
Your mom is so fat when you printed the picture, it would not stop printing! 😂🤣
What do you call it when everyone of your friends makes too many dumb Covid jokes? A pundemic.
what do you get when you cross parents, the san fran bridge and a moody asian teen?
Niagra falls
When the quiet kid gets angry and the sped kid sees your hiding spot.
Bing, bang, boom!
My friend had an allergic reaction after he ate a peanut.
We got his EpiPen to help him when Penaldo appeared because he heard the word "PEN". He tried stealing the pen, but I said, "No pens for you," and "Brentford". He cried and ran away. Shame on you, Penaldo the fraud!
Even people who are good for nothing have the capacity to bring a smile to your face, like when you push them down the stairs.
How do you know Johnny Depp finished his meal?
When you see fifty empty bottles of wine on his front doorstep.
A little girl was sitting with some other kids. She thought to herself, "I want to have kids when I'm older, at least they’ll have a home, parents, and hopefully a dad that actually came back with the milk!" 🤣😂
Yo mama so old when she farts, dust comes out.