
Whats jokes
Wow, Aiden, maybe you've been mean to Tenya. She is hurting, close to killing herself, but hey, I can pick your ass since, ya know, that is what I do!
What do oranges sweat?
Orange juice. 😂🍊❤️
I forgot what lightning was. Then it struck me.
What's the difference between dark humor and morbid humor?
Dark humor is 10 babies in a trash can. Morbid humor is 1 baby in 10 trashcans.
A man walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "What, no soap?" Then he dies and she marries the barber.
What's big, round, and can't move?
A vegetable!
What do you call a feminazi that has a dick the size of a Vienna Sausage?
Fudge Packer.
What did the angel say when it went to heaven? Well, halo there!
What is a thing orphans have that we can never have?
Imaginary parents.
What did the butcher say to the pig?
Nice to meat you.
What do you call a gay drive-by? A fruit roll-up.
An old man goes to church.
One Sunday morning, an old cowboy entered a church just before services were to begin. Although the old man and his clothes were spotlessly clean, he wore jeans, a denim shirt, and boots that were very worn and ragged. In his hand, he carried a worn-out old hat and an equally worn-out Bible.
The church he entered was in a very upscale and exclusive part of the city. It was the largest and most beautiful church the old cowboy had ever seen. The people of the congregation were all dressed in expensive clothes and accessories.
As the cowboy took a seat, the others moved away from him. No one greeted, spoke to, or welcomed him. They were all appalled at his appearance and did not attempt to hide it.
As the old cowboy was leaving the church, the preacher approached him and asked the cowboy to do him a favor. "Before you come back in here again, have a talk with God and ask him what he thinks would be appropriate attire for worship."
The old cowboy assured the preacher he would.
The next Sunday, he showed back up for the services wearing the same ragged jeans, shirt, boots, and hat. Once again, he was completely shunned and ignored. The preacher approached the man and said, "I thought I asked you to speak to God before you came back to our church."
"I did," replied the old cowboy.
"If you spoke to God, what did he tell you the proper attire should be for worshiping in here?" asked the preacher.
"Well, sir, God told me that He didn't have a clue what I should wear. He said He'd never been in this church."
Me: Mom, I think I need to go to the hospital.
Mom: OMG, why son?
Me: I don't know what's wrong, but every time I close my eyes, I can see.
Think about it, then spread LMAO.
What do Paul Walker and I have in common? Neither of us have seen Fast and the Furious 7.
What happens when a battery commits a crime? They get charged!
What did Jeffrey Dahmer do after dumping his first boyfriend?
A blind guy walks into a bar with his seeing eye dog. He then picks his dog up by the tail and starts to swing him around. The bartender asks him, "Hey man, what the hell you doing?"
Blind guy says, "Just looking around."
What do pedophiles and a SpongeBob intro have in common?
Are you ready kids?
What’s a Mexican person’s favorite spot?
Cross country. 😉
What’s better than Stephen Hawking?
Stephen walking.
