Valentine Day

Valentine Day jokes

Birthday

People were talking and asking what's the worst day of the year for them.

Person 1: "The first day of school because I don't like going to school."

Person 2: "Valentine's day because it's too lovey."

Me: "Oh nice, mine is my birthday because it's when I was born."

  • 4
  • Poem

    My girlfriend asked me to write her a poem for Valentines Day:

    Roses are red, Watches are gold. Get on your knees, And do as you're told.

  • 0
  • Memes

    Orphan

    Why does an orphan's calendar only have 362 days? Because they don't celebrate Father's Day, Mother's Day, and Valentine's Day.

    Hitler

    You know Hitler loves you when he comes up to you on Valentine's Day and he says, "Will you be my Valenein?"

    Rose

    Roses are red. Violets are blue. If he's busy on Valentine's Day, the side chick is you.

    Name

    Englishman: We named our son George since he was born on Saint George's Day.

    Irishman: We called our daughter Valentine since she was born on Valentine's Day.

    Scotsman: We named our son Pancake because he was born on Pancake Day!

    Duck

    I "onerie," or however you spell it, I like to replace all romance or similar memes with duck memes. Just comment duck memes there and change Valentine's Day to Duck Day. Also, for the joke:

    Why did the duck walk up to the lemonade stand?

    Because he wanted grapes.

    Memes

    Community

    AHAHRIFBIRBFIBNAIKBNSZIFB NEW BOOK IDEA Valentines Wrath

    Core Premise (Cleaned Up)

    On Valentine’s Day, a woman is publicly and cruelly dumped by her boyfriend—who admits he has been cheating. Rather than confront the betrayal directly, she becomes fixated on the other woman. She engineers a “chance” meeting, befriends her, and slowly builds an intense emotional connection. What begins as revenge evolves into something far more dangerous and intimate, culminating in the two women having an affair—turning the original betrayal back on the man who caused it.