Whats jokes
A pirate walked into a bar with his ship's steering wheel hanging off his pants. The bartender says, "Hey! What's with the steering wheel?" The pirate says, "I don't know but it's driving me nuts!"
What do you get when you insert human DNA into a goat? Banned from the petting zoo!
What do you call someone that illegally transports cups? - A s-mug-gler.
What happened to the fly on the toilet seat?
It got pissed off.
What can you tell a dog, but not your girlfriend? Come.
Memes
always happens to me
What do you call a bunch of white people running down a hill? An avalanche.
What about Mexicans you may ask? A mudslide.
What about black people running down a hill?? A jailbreak.
What's white on top and black on the bottom? Society.
Man to woman: "Would you sleep with me for one million dollars?"
Woman: "Sure."
Man: "How about for ten dollars?"
Woman: "What do you think I am?"
Man: "We’ve already established what you are. All we’re doing is negotiating price."
What is a retard's favorite race? The grand autismo.
If you are ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What’s the difference between fruit and dead babies?
I don’t put fruit in a blender.
What do children and lights have in common? They both hang from ceilings!
Not funny, here’s another.
Why can’t China play baseball? They ate the bat.
Doctor: What makes you feel depressed?
Me: I used to work at the World Trade Center, before the plane hit.
Doctor: A lot of people fell to pieces after that.
WARNING OFFENSIVE: What is the difference between a redhead and a brick? ... A brick gets laid.
What’s the difference between people and chocolate? I can still buy dark chocolate.
What do you call a lost Indian woman? Ms. Singh.
What did the little boy say to the fat man?
How many Japs did you get?
What do you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?
Stop and apply lubrication.
*Hears the news about Sandy Hook* Person 1: "God, I can only imagine what was going through those kids' heads in the last moments of their lives..."
Person 2: "Probably Bullets."
Person 1: "OMG!! Can you even think of what their parents are going through?!"
Person 2: "Probably Coffin Brochures."
Person 1: "...."
Person 2: "It's called dark humor. Dark humor is like food, not everyone gets it."
What's an emo person's least favorite game? Cut The Rope.