Water jokes
Are you my fish? Because you're supposed to be dead.
What do you get when you throw holy water on a cow?
A holy cow!
My late grandpa was always popular with women. One day, before he died, I asked him what his secret was. He said, "I inherited a watering hole."
Bewildered, I replied, "What does that have to do with anything?"
"I could easily get anyone wet because I was well endowed."
Two boys were at a lake, and they went to a bush and saw a naked lady.
One ran away, the other one followed the one who ran and asked why he ran. The boy answered, "My mum told me if I saw a naked lady I would turn to stone. I ran away because I felt something get hard."
Why doesn't Adele swim properly?
Because she's rolling in the deep. 🤽♂️
Memes
my huskies be like:
I went scuba diving last year. It was fun, but at the end, I ran out of oxygen.
It was a breathtaking experience.
[God creating a jellyfish]
God: How about an evil bag?
Why couldn't a lifeguard save the hippie? -- Because he was too far out, man.
What did the sea do when it saw the beach?
It waved!
Jack and Jill went up the hill 'cause Jack took a Viagra.
Jill was drunk, fell to her knee, Jack had his chance, did Jill till 3.
What do you call it when a girl on her period goes swimming?
A blood bath.
Two simple steps to get 15,000 people to follow you:
Step 1: Buy a bottle of water (doesn't matter the size).
Step 2: Run through Africa with that bottle of water.
Perfect! Now you got yourself half the population there following you!
Your mama's so fat, when she jumps in the pool, the water jumps out!
Why do ducks have feathers? So they can cover their butt quacks.
What is a fish’s 🐟 favorite game?
Salmon Says!
What is the only video game to be ever made in Africa?
Where's My Water?
In memory of Michael Jackson, Starbucks and various other establishments are introducing the Jackson tea. It's 50 year old water, with a 7 year old tea bag.
What is the worst tool to play when playing the game “Icebreaker”?
The Titanic.
*WARNING* THIS WILL NEVER GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD - READ IF YOU DARE.....
What came first? The chicken or the egg?
Which came first? The color orange or the fruit?
Who taught the first ever teacher?
If you expect the unexpected, doesn't that make the unexpected expected?
If you describe something as 'indescribable', then haven't you already described it?
In the word 'scent', is the silent letter the 's' or the 'ce'?
Why do your lips touch when they say the word 'separate', but don't touch when you say the word 'together'?
How many photos do you think you could be in the background of?
The guy who discovered cow milk, what was he doing with that cow?
Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, "Oh no, it's a cop"?
Is it possible to cry underwater?
If two left handers have an argument, who is right?
I warned you!! You just didn't listen.... :O
Yo mama so fat! When she jumps into a pool, NASA found water on Mars!