Water jokes
Me: I have depression.
Someone: You should get out more! Go outside!
Me: *goes to the beach* Now it's a tropical depression.
Why do priests perform baptisms? So they can see children wet.
Titanic walks into a bar. Britannic: "What would you like to drink?" Titanic: "An iceberg."
What runs but never stops?
What did the sand say when it got into a fight with the ocean?
"Oh my God, you're such a beach!"
I went to the dam to take the dam tour, but the dam tour guide told me there wasn't going to be a dam tour that day. So I was thirsty and I wanted some dam water, but the dam man wouldn't give me any dam water, so I told the dam man to keep his dam water.
You remind me of a snowflake, beautiful and unique. One touch and you're wet.
I found out how to gain millions of followers.
Run through Africa with a bottle of water.
Don't you just hate when you have to eat cereal with water because your dad won't bring the fucking milk? Cause same.
How many dead kittens does it take to clog a pool filter? Seven when I tried!
The "W" in Africa stands for water.
Water was found on Mars.
Mars: 1 Africa: 0
What's the difference between the milkman and my dad?
Nothing, they are both one thing except he never returns with milk.
(I've been eating cereal with water COMBINATION!)
My late grandpa was always popular with women. One day, before he died, I asked him what his secret was. He said, "I inherited a watering hole."
Bewildered, I replied, "What does that have to do with anything?"
"I could easily get anyone wet because I was well endowed."
You know it's so hard to clean my sex toys.
Thank you, Jesus, for creating holy water!
Roses are red, Get on the ground, Gimme your stuff, Get ready to drown!
Me: Do you eat your cereal with water? You: No, why? Me: 'Cause your dad never came back with the milk!
What is illegal in Africa? Water guns.
Two boys were at a lake, and they went to a bush and saw a naked lady.
One ran away, the other one followed the one who ran and asked why he ran. The boy answered, "My mum told me if I saw a naked lady I would turn to stone. I ran away because I felt something get hard."
You're the type of person to wash your hands after a shower.