Water jokes
How do you drown a Blonde? You put a scratch and sniff sticker in a pool.
Do you think I can shoot a basketball?
I make it dip like water.
Why is the ocean so salty? Probably because the land doesn't wave back.
A few male neighbors came over to the house to take a shower because, for some reason, their house didn't have water.
A few minutes later, I walk into the shower. I see the male neighbors and Mom taking a shower together. Then I said, "What are you doing?" They all say, "We're taking a shower together so we could save water."
The ocean didn't start smelling like fish until women started swimming in it.
How are corpses like pools?
Once you get in, it's only cold for like a minute.
You know it's so hard to clean my sex toys. Thank you, Jesus, for creating baptism.
Remember: Alcohol doesn't solve your problems, but neither does milk or water.
I told a seal a joke, it went like this: "Why did the kid cross the playground?" He said, "Why?" I said, "To get to the other slide." And then he said, "That's the sealiest thing I've ever heard!"
Me: Do you eat your cereal with water? You: No, why? Me: 'Cause your dad never came back with the milk!
What kind of fish comes out at night?
A starfish.
What do Stephen Hawking and the Wicked Witch have in common?
If you throw water over them, they both die...
What do you call a bottle of water flying over Africa?
A UFO.
What's the most illegal activity in Africa?
Watering the plants.
A man once sued smart water for not making him smart. Then a woman replied, “Okay cool, now I’m going to go sue Thin Mints for not making me thin.”
Why is the sea salty? Because it is always blue.
What did the sea say to the sea?
Nothing, it just waved.
We almost drowned when we went out boating, but I got a watermelon to keep me floating.
Why was the sand wet? Because the sea weed!
What do you do when an epileptic has a seizure in the bathtub?
Throw in some laundry...