Sea jokes
What do fish take to stay healthy?
Vitamin Sea.
What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just WAVED. Can you SEA what I did there? I'm SHORE you did. Why are you so SALTY? Don't be a BEACH.
What did the fish get on his math test?
A sea plus.
Last night, I had a dream that I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda. I guess it was just a Fanta sea!
Why don't oysters share their pearls?
Because they're shellfish!
What did the beach say as the tide came in?
Long time, no sea.
Fishing and girlfriends are exactly alike. There may be plenty of fish in the sea, but until I find one, I'm stuck here holding my rod.
How do you cut the sea in half?
With a sea-saw.
Why did the shark spit out the clown?
Because he tasted funny!
What would you find on a haunted beach?
A sand-witch!
"Hey guys, I'm a new jokester, remember my name as I'll be making a lot more!!! P.S. They will be much better than this one!"
Why did the fish cross the sea?
To get to the other tide! š š š
Once there were twins, Mark and Michael. Mark was the owner of an old boat. It so happened that Michael's wife died the same day that Mark's boat sank. A few days later, a kindly old woman saw Mark and mistook him for Michael. She said, "I'm sorry to hear about your loss. You must just feel terrible." Mark, thinking that she was talking about his boat, said, "Heck no. In fact, I'm sort of glad to be rid of her. She was a rotten old thing right from the beginning. Her bottom was all shriveled up and she smelled like old dead fish. She was always losing her water; she had a bad crack in the back and a pretty big hole in the front too. Every time I used her, her hole got bigger and she leaked like crazy. I guess what finally finished her off was when I rented her to these four guys looking for a good time. I warned them that she wasn't very good, but they wanted to use her anyhow. The fools tried to get in her all at once and she split right up the middle!" The old lady fainted.
I had a dream about the whole ocean being filled with orange soda.
Turns out it was a Fanta sea.
Why can't blind people eat fish?
Because it's sea food.
Last night I had a dream about fishing poles, turns out it wasn't reel!
How does the sea say hello?
It WAVES you.
SEA what I did there?
I'm SHORE you saw it.
Don't be SALTY!
I'm on a seafood diet, I see food and I eat it.
Why was the sand wet? Because the sea weed!
What are fish not allowed to have?
Seaweed.
Why is the sea salty?
Because the land never waves back.