Vs jokes
What's similar between a fetus and a failed mission?
You abort it.
Why is it that when women decide to kill an unborn baby, it's a "CHOICE," but when I decide to drive my F-150 into a playground full of kids, it's called "MURDER"!
What's the difference between a pair of jeans and an African baby?
A pair of jeans only has 1 fly.
What's the difference between acne and a Catholic priest? Acne waits until a kid is a teenager to come on its face.
What's the difference between you and a calendar?
Calendars got dates.
What's the difference between a Corvette and a pile of dead babies?
I don't have a Corvette in my garage.
What’s the difference between Kendrick Lamar and an orphan?
He has family ties.
What’s the difference between 9/11 and a cow?
You can’t milk a cow for 15 years.
What's the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?
Snowballs ;)
What’s the difference between school and prison? One is painted.
How are infants and chocolate alike? They'll both kill your dog.
I'm sorry and I apologize mean the same thing, except at a funeral.
What's the difference between bounties and orphans?
The bounty is wanted.
What's the difference between a priest and a pimple?
A pimple will wait until you're 12 years old to come on your face.
What is the difference between a Catholic priest and acne? -- Acne comes on your face after you turn 13.
What’s the difference between Usain Bolt and Hitler?
Usain finished the races.
Are you a nation leader or an email deleter?
What's the difference between a brand new Oldsmobile and a brand new Raping?
...Rape.
Iceberg: You may know me.
Titanic: You are a sucker.
Iceberg: You hit me.
Titanic: Moron.
Iceberg: Waaaaaaaaaa!
Titanic: I don’t give a shit.
What's the difference between a dead hooker and a watermelon?
The watermelon didn't scream when I sliced it.