Violence jokes

My sister told me words don't hurt her, so I chucked a dictionary at her.

I'm in school shooting. #USA

My friend told me to beat that pussy up... so why is the local animal control at my door?

A B C D E F G.

Gummy bears are chasing me, one is red, one is blue. One is chewing up my shoe. Now I'm running for my life because the red one's got a knife!

When the school shooter starts doing Fortnite dances and the autistic kid joins in.

If you punch an orphan, they can't do anything; they can't tell their parents.

I was having a party in my basement, and my friend asked me what that bag covered in blood was for. I said, "Oh, that's the bag I catch the children with to torture them in this basement."

So I went to the bank and a lady asked me to check her balance... so I pushed her over.

How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb?

More than five because my basement is still dark.

Q. How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A. Gotta be more than 9 'cause my basement is still dark.

Where did Lucy go in the bombing... Everywhere.

Where did Susie go after the bomb exploded?

Everywhere.

One day an old woman came into the bank and asked me to check her balance... So, I pushed her over.

Knock knock!!

Who's there??

Dishwasher!!

Dishwasher who??

Dishwasher way i used to talk when i got my head kicked in!

It's not a war crime if no one's alive to report it.

One day I went to my friend's apartment, and he told me to make myself at home.

I threw him out of the window. I hate having visitors!

Diddy and Hawk Tuah walk into a bar. Hawk Tuah says, "Spit on that thang!" Only one walks out. 💀

What's the quickest way to get to the hospital? Just stand in the middle of a busy road.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

What do my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can't be found.

What do you do after raping a deaf person? Cut their fingers off so they don't tell anyone.

MORE JOKES COMING SOON LMAO ;]

My friend, Jackson Huge-T, got raped by Huge-D's.

A sad guy called "nun" is crying next to the grave of his best friend called "month". "Month" got killed by a gay guy, and after that, "nun" got homophobic.

While "nun" is sitting next to "month"'s grave, he heard a guy ask his friend: 《Do You Wanna Play A Game On?》 "Nun" got angry and he asked that guy: 《What did you just say to your friend?》 The guy answers: 《A game on, why?》

"Nun" kills the two guys.

🤔