Violence jokes
Is shooting and killing a pregnant woman a spawn kill or double kill?
One day I went to my friend's apartment, and he told me to make myself at home.
I threw him out of the window. I hate having visitors!
Diddy and Hawk Tuah walk into a bar. Hawk Tuah says, "Spit on that thang!" Only one walks out. 💀
It's not a war crime if no one's alive to report it.
Bully: Ur momma so fat that the whales said we are family even though you are a little bigger than us.
Nerd: Yo momma so ugly that when she went in the bathtub, the water jumped out.
Silence...................punch!
Teacher: Your bag is heavy, what's in there?
The quiet kid: AK-47.
Your soul is black. I have 4 guns, little kid. Get in the van before I shoot you!
Where did Susie go after the bomb exploded?
Everywhere.
So I went to the bank and a lady asked me to check her balance... so I pushed her over.
Knock knock!!
Who's there??
Dishwasher!!
Dishwasher who??
Dishwasher way i used to talk when i got my head kicked in!
What first went through Sally’s head when the Nazis came?
A bullet.
What do you call a kid on the track team who isn't on the track team?
A school shooter.
My sister told me words don't hurt her, so I chucked a dictionary at her.
A retarded kid sees a murderer chopping up his latest victim with a saw. The retarded kid yells, "Seesaw!" because he sees a saw.
How many babies does it take to paint the side of a barn?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
I kick a soccer ball at someone in a wheelchair. Now we're playing Rocket League.
My friend told me to beat that pussy up... so why is the local animal control at my door?
When the school shooter starts doing Fortnite dances and the autistic kid joins in.
Sonic says: If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
"Fuck off for I killed him, bum bum."