If you push some one that's bullying, if you kill some one that's murder, if there is no evidence it's nothing
Chuck Norris once heard nothing can kill him. So he tracked down nothing and killed it.
A man with a gun goes into a bank and demands for money.
Once he is given the money, he turns to a customer and asks, "Did you see me rob this bank?"
The man replied, "Yes sir, I did."
The robber shot him in the head, killing him instantly.
He then turned to a couple standing next to him and asked the man, "Did you see me rob this bank?"
The man replied, "No sir, I didn't, but my wife did!"
My friend surprised me for my birthday with a book called ‘Road-Kill Recipes’. I did find some roadkill the other day, so I cooked it according to one recipe and it was delicious. I’m just not sure what I should do with the bicycle.
Say what you want about Hitler, he wasn't all that bad. After all, he killed Hitler.
When a family friend passed away, my granddaughter took her three-year-old son to visit the widow. As they approached the front door, she whispered to the boy, “Make sure to tell her how sorry you are.”
He whispered back, “Why? I didn’t kill him.”
One day a father and a daughter were at a park. The daughter accidentally kills a butterfly. The father says, "Just because you killed the butterfly, you don't get butter for a week." They were there the next day, and the daughter kills a cockroach. The father laughs and says, "Nice try."
What's the difference between you and Hitler? Hitler knew when to kill himself.
If u kill an emo Is it an assist kill?
What the worst thing about committing suicide, You can only do it once
What's the only regret you would have when you eventually kill yourself, It wasn't Sooner
What the difference between a feminist and Hitler?
Both were good at starting wars, only difference was Hitler knew when to kill himself afterwards.
I respect cancer more than I respect depression. At least cancer has the balls to kill you himself.
I would never kill an animal. I'm more of a people person.
why did the man say chickens were lucky..? because they get killed and eaten.
What is a similarity between a pregnant 14-year-old and the fetus inside of her?
They both are thinking "Shit! Mom is gonna kill me!"
Why did the feminist kill herself?
Because she was TRIGGERED.
When someone tells me to kill myself
Panic! At The Disco: Don't Threaten Me With A Good Time
I got the newest Call of Duty game! I got a 200 kill streak, then I went home and played COD.
How come when women decide to kill their unborn baby its a "choice". But when I decide to drive my car into a playground full of children its called "murder".
Why you can't kill a depressed person?
Because they are already dead inside.
