Violence jokes
Me: Wanna play a game?
Sister: Ya, what is it?
Me: Tic tac toe.
Sister:?
Takes out knife and rolls up sleeve.
Me: Tic tac toe.
How do you put a baby in a blender feet first so you can see its facial expressions?
How do you get the baby out? With a tortilla chip!
Why was the kid not able to cross the hallway?
Answer: The school shooter already shot him in the middle of the hallway.
There is a Mexican sitting on a train.
The guy sitting next to him says, "I have a big dick."
The Mexican decides to get a lawnmower and some clippers. When he got off the train, the police found a dead body with no dick and pube hairs.
*School shooting happens* Foreign exchange student: *Sobbing under desk* American student: "First time?"
I'm in the alagba association. Call 666-666-666 to join the gang. It's free and free kills duidui.
How do you put a baby in the blender feet first so you can see its facial expressions?
How do you get it out? Tortilla chip.
How long does it take to blow up a baby in the microwave?
I don't know, I close my eyes when I masturbate...
How to make an orphan BLEED?
Step 1 - Tell them to clap until they actually have a loving family.
Step 2 - LAUGH EVILLY as they BLEED.
Step 3 - Tell them to kys.
Step 4 - Leave that mental asylum.
In the average room, there are about 2,894,638 items that Chuck Norris can use to kill you, including the room itself.
Me: Hey, do you want to meet my grandma?
Friend: Yeah, sure.
Me: *pulls out gun*
How do you make rape funny? Tickle her while you do it.
So Little Johnny saw a robbery, so he tried to stop the robber. To the robber's surprise, he was amazed. So Johnny got 20 shots to the head. The End.
What do you call an autistic kid in a school shooting?
Target practice.
Sadly, blind jokes are cruel. A kid at my school was punched the other day for being blind.
Sadly, he didn't see it coming.
What's black and white and red all over? A penguin that's just been raped.
Here's a tip for cow tipping from TheRussianBadger.
"So if you see Otis from Barnyard, make sure you blast his ass from a distance!"
How do you circumcise a hillbilly? You kick his sister in the jaw.
If you’re bored, just punch an orphan.
What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Studies have shown that in London, a person is stabbed 24 times a second. Poor bastard!