Violence

Violence jokes

Flavor

  • Why is black mystery not an Airheads flavor? Because we already know what happened to them. *shot fires*

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  • Gummy bear

  • A B C D E F G.

    Gummy bears are chasing me, one is red, one is blue. One is chewing up my shoe. Now I'm running for my life because the red one's got a knife!

    Basement

  • I was having a party in my basement, and my friend asked me what that bag covered in blood was for. I said, "Oh, that's the bag I catch the children with to torture them in this basement."

    Baby

  • How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb?

    More than five because my basement is still dark.

    Baby

  • Q. How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

    A. Gotta be more than 9 'cause my basement is still dark.

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  • Balance

  • One day an old woman came into the bank and asked me to check her balance... So, I pushed her over.

    Privilege

  • Can people please shut up about "male privileges"? There is no right that men have that women don't.

    Women have the right to genital integrity. Women can vote without having to sign up for the draft.

    Women have the right to choose parenthood; men do not.

    Women have the right to be assumed caregivers for children.

    Women have the right to call unwanted, coerced sex rape.

    Women have the right to lower jail sentences for the same crime.

    Women have the right to not be assumed sexual predators.

    Women have the right to government departments that solely serve their interests. They also have the luxury of "women only" events that men cannot even dream of. (They even took the boy scouts away from us.)

    Women have the right to government-enforced gender quotas.

    Women have the right to exclusive tax benefits for being a business owner.

    Women have the right to domestic violence shelters.

    Women have the right to not be assumed the primary aggressor in a domestic dispute.

    Women have the right to rape a man or boy, and if she gets pregnant from that man/boy, they can sue him for child support.

    So it is women who have more rights.

    So shut up, feminists, please.

    Hospital

  • What's the quickest way to get to the hospital? Just stand in the middle of a busy road.

    What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

    What do my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can't be found.

    What do you do after raping a deaf person? Cut their fingers off so they don't tell anyone.

    MORE JOKES COMING SOON LMAO ;]

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  • Nun

  • A sad guy called "nun" is crying next to the grave of his best friend called "month". "Month" got killed by a gay guy, and after that, "nun" got homophobic.

    While "nun" is sitting next to "month"'s grave, he heard a guy ask his friend: 《Do You Wanna Play A Game On?》 "Nun" got angry and he asked that guy: 《What did you just say to your friend?》 The guy answers: 《A game on, why?》

    "Nun" kills the two guys.

    🤔

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  • Rape

  • Easy way to get away from rape is to become the rapist. All women need to carry a 12-inch dildo and a gun!

  • 7
  • Rapist

  • How many rapists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

    Punchline: One, but they prefer soda bottles instead.

  • 3