Violence jokes
The two brothers were sitting next to each other. They played with planes all day long. They got too violent, and now their sister (World Trade Center) stands there. The brothers were put up for adoption, and the planes were given back to their owners.
Quiet Kid: *reaches into bag*
Teacher: EVERYBODY RUN!
I pushed a disabled kid into a fire and roared, "Hot wheels!"
What happens when you put a baby in a blender?
The baby is a cherry smoothie.
I gave a blind kid a gun and said it was a blow dryer.
Memes
Fr all you gotta do is get one enemy
What do you do if you see a nigger shot 50 times? Stop laughing and reload.
If you’re ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What are American schools?
Shooting ranges.
I tell a man, "Get me a Glock 19." He comes back with a glove. I was about to shout at him, but then I saw a pistol in his pocket, so I left and thanked him.
Granny says don't worry, the cries of pain are only my ex-husband's.
Me: Stops the quiet kid from getting bullied.
Him: Don't come to school tomorrow, trust me.
Me: "/"
We don't have school shooters; we have special ed breeches.
Hi everyone, my mom got me an iPad today, and this is really cool. Can someone tell me what decapitation is?
What's a suicide bomber's biggest fear?
Dying alone.
I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into a campfire and shouted out "Hot Wheels!"
What happens when you find a bomb at your local bazaar?
It becomes a flee market.
Like a shooter says, "I put the fun in funeral!"
Why do you put a baby into a blender feet first?
So you can see the look on its face...
So, I am an emo dude, so I sit in the back of the class, and I talk to no one.
But one day this dude came up to me and tried to talk to me, so I just ignored him. Then he got really pissed off and said, "I'm gonna kill you." I was like, "You're gonna kill me just because I ignored you? Is your ego that big, wow?" He left. Then the next day he brought his goons with him and said, "Now you're dead." I ignored him again, and he said, "You will pay for this."
So the following day after school I was walking down the street back to my house. Then he and his goons tried to attack me, but then they died, so I kept on walking. I had some rope traps set.
This was the best day of my life.
This is why you never mess with emos. We have ropes everywhere.
How do you fit 100 rape victims inside a Mini Cooper?
In the ashtray.