Violence jokes
If you are ever mad, punch an orphan.
What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Don't break girls' hearts. Break their legs instead. They're two.
Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? Don’t worry, he woke up.
In my basement.
How it be when the new guy takes too long...
Hay Danny, it's me Johnny.
Johnny: Boss says to kill the guy in red. Point the gun at his head.
Danny: Ok, target locked. 3... 2... 1... bang.
Johnny: Danny, hope you did not get the man in red.
Danny: OH MY BRO FOR REALL.
My Crandall just be smashing more than you ON DA GIRLS, and he was slapping your girl last night harder than WILL at the OSCARS! ;)
What happens when an orphan is told that someone had found their parents?
They cry...
They scream... with joy.
"Oh wait, no, that wasn't your parents."
Orphan grabs a knife out of the kitchen, lets just say, the orphan didn't live to tell the tail...
Are you a knife?
Because I want to deep throat you.
What is more fun than spinning a clown around on a clothes line at 100 miles an hour?
Stopping it with a pitchfork.
If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
I wish I was at a Western bar; then I would get shot.
I was in the bedroom slapping your girl harder than Will at the Oscars.
What does a baby and a grenade have in common?
They both make a noise when you throw them.
How did Rihanna find out Chris Brown was cheating on her? She found another woman's lipstick on his knuckles.
The boy was clapping, then he became clapped.
Please don't get mad, it's a joke.
What's the difference between a bullet and a police officer? At least when a bullet kills someone, it's fired.
Billy: Dad, I was shot by a sniper!
Dad: Uh...
*hides his rifle*
Hey, wake up. I just murdered your family, but I live alone.
Then who are these people in your house? They are people in my house? Well, not anymore, dumb bitch. You're welcome, you could have died.
"Sonic Says", "If you're ever bored and have nothing to do, then just punch an orphan in the face. Who are they gonna tell? Their parents?"
What’s the difference between a police man and a bullet?
At least when a bullet kills someone, it’s actually fired.
What's worse than a dead baby?
A pile of dead babies.
What's worse than that?
One's alive at the bottom.
What's even worse than THAT?
It eats it's way out.
Wait it gets worse...
It goes back for seconds.
Just one more I swear...
It fucks one of it's siblings at the bottom.