3 Drunk men get in a taxi, the driver knew they were drunk so he started the car and turned it off. the first man gave him the money, the second man thanked him but the third man slapped the driver, the driver surprised that he noticed so he askes why and the third man replies with ¨why did you drive so fast.¨
What’s the difference between a blonde and a masqueto?
A masqueto stops sucking when you slap it
I hate 2 faced people because I don’t know which face to slap first.
What’s the difference between a mosquito and a blonde?the mosquito stops sucking after you slap it.
Richard: Mom, someone called me gay. Richard’s mom: Why didn’t you slap him across him face. Richard: No, I couldn’t. Richard’s mom: Why. Richard: Because he was cute.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to get some marijuana. Jack got high and slapped her thigh and said you know you wanna. Jill said yes pulled down her dress and then they had some fun. Silly Jill forgot the pill and now they have a son.
Somebody told me chemistry joke. I thought it was sodium funny, I slapped my neon that one.
The Pope and Donald Trump are on stage in front of a huge crowd.
The Pope leaned towards Trump and said, “Do you know that with one little wave of my hand I can make every person in this crowd go wild with joy? This joy will not be a momentary display, like that of your followers, but go deep into their hearts and for the rest of their lives whenever they speak of this day, they will rejoice!"
Trump replies, “I seriously doubt that. With one little wave of your hand? Show me!”
So the Pope slapped him.
An Englishman, a Frenchman, a ravishing blonde and an old lady are sharing a compartment on a train as it winds its way through the Alps. Every now and then the train passes through a tunnel, during which time the compartment is plunged into complete darkness. On one such occasion, a ringing slap is heard and as the train passes back into daylight, the Frenchman is rubbing his sore, red cheek.
The old lady thinks, “I bet that dirty Frenchman fondled the blonde and she struck the pervert.”
The blonde thinks, “I bet that filthy Frenchman was looking to grope me in the dark, mistook the old lady for me and she slapped him.”
The Frenchman thinks, “I bet that perfidious Englishman touched up the blonde in the dark and she slapped me by mistake.”
The Englishman thinks, “I can’t wait for another tunnel so I can slap that French twat again.”
What’s the difference between hooker and a mosquito?
The mosquito stops sucking after you slap it.
The shovel is a Ground Breaking invention. Slaps and laugh
Why did the bum get a slap ?
Because it was being to cheeky
Little Johnny was eating dinner with his family. His mother went around the table and asked, “mark, what would you like to eat?” Mark said, “I’d like some fucking potato’s.” SMACK! mother slapped mark. She then asked suzie, “what would you like to eat?” “Well, I’d like some fucking potatos” said suzie SMAACK! she slapped suzie. “Ok. Johnny, what would you like to eat?” Well… I sure as hell dont want no fucking potatos.
What is the difference between a mosquito and a blonde? A mosquito stops sucking after you f*cking slap it.
In my house, good sex sounds like seals slapping each other.
What are the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
Only one of them stops sucking after you slap it.
daughter:dad why are you so mean dad:because you are so mean that’s why daughter:you so get on my nerves dad:i am gonna slap you in yo god darn head if you don’t shut up daughter:wow dad you savage dad:21 SAVAGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! daughter:oh my god i am telln’ mom that you are doin’ that thing again
i would slap you , but that would be animal abuse
I would slap you but that would be animal abuse （▼へ▼メ） （▼へ▼メ） （▼へ▼メ） （▼へ▼メ）
When I’m bored I like to slap orphans I mean what are they gonna do tell their parents