Use jokes
What gun was used to kill Bin Laden?
An AK-BAR 47.
Why was Stephen Hawking arrested? The police used computer GPS.
Your mummy is so tall, she uses the Eiffel Tower as a dildo.
LEGO Ninjago - I like it, okay?
Which of the ninja would be best for an undercover mission as the person in disguise?
Kai. He just has to leave his hair down and no one would know it was him. He uses hair gel, as Cole has said a couple times I think, because his hair looks like fire 🔥!
Q: How do you get a squirrel to like you? A: Act like a nut! 😂
Q: Why don't eggs tell jokes? A: Because they'd crack each other up.
Son: Dad, can you put my shoes on? Dad: No, son, I don't think they would fit me.
I'm on a seafood diet. When I see food, I eat it.
I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.
What do you call a wizard who uses Ice Magic? A: A Blizzard!
How do you know someone is fucking dumb?
They put jokes that have been used several times already.
How do rappers stay cool?
They use RAP-SICLES.
Not a joke but there's nowhere else to post this, (mainly this post is for the broke people without a gym). Did you know that the body can't tell if you're using weights? So lifting weights are optional.
Some beginner workouts without weights for like really weak people:
1. Sit-ups 10 reps 2. Push-ups 20 per reps 3. Squats 10 per reps 4. Crunches 10 per reps
How do you trick a Catholic priest into using the glory hole at an adult bookstore? Tell him it is a confessional booth.
What do you call a baby with red curry fried hair?
A baby using a potato peeler and a comb.
Why can't you hear a psychiatrist using the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent.
Why do orphans never use other people's Wi-Fi?
So they can be connected.
You know what pun is used for "waist?"
Nothing. You'll find nothing.
It's just a waste of time.
Your hairline's so far back even Bill Nye the Science Guy couldn't use photosynthesis to fix it.
Using modern day technology you can produce music with a Tesla coil. I don't know if you heard it, but it is quite shocking and even electrifying. I can't tell if it is metal or techno, but it is more valuable than joules. It really amps up your blood pressure and has you saying watt the whole time. It is way better than current music.
Nobody
Literally nobody
Gordan Ramsey: do you need me to bring Hitler back to life so he can show you how to use a fucking oven?
Draw an accurate diagram representing the elephant genitalia. Use all 30 sheets of paper provided.
What do people use more than you that is yours?
What’s the difference between erotic and kinky?
Erotic is usually a feather. Kinky is using the whole chicken.