The brain named itself, and when the brain realised that it named itseld, it was surprised.
But maybe, it was a spelling mistake and the brain wanted the name Brian. We all have a little Brian in us!
Not a joke but theres no where else to post this , ( mainly this post is for the broke people w/o a gym ) . Did you know that the body can't tell if ur using weights? so lifting weights are optional . some beginner workouts W/O weights for like really weak ppls . 1. sit - up's 10 reps 2. push - up's 20 per reps 3. squat's 10 per reps 4. crunches 10 per reps
What should you do if you meet a giant? Use big words.
What do pigs use to clean up? Hogwash.
What should you do to prevent dry skin? Use a towel.
Pilot: So Kobe, it seems like you’re not going to make it to your destination in time so I’m going to put it on autopilot so I can find a place to fill with gas.
Kobe: take us to the side of that mountain at full speed. I don’t really want to go to the event anymore.
What do you call a pig who knows how to use a knife? A pork chop.
What do you call two old men drooling in their wheelchairs? The 2028 US election.
My parents told me that I should go hang with my friends and get out of the house. So I called some of my friends and told them to meet me in the school yard, one said “ what tree?” I replied “you’ll know when you get here”
My parents never said how they wanted us to hangout.
You know why you remind me of a calculator? Because 1+1 equals the 2 of us
Me: uses the crucifix
Rush: Ahahahahahahæanananana
The first time you have a new phone you have a different one you can change your phone to a new phone but it doesn’t change the phone 📱 it’s just different I think it will work I just think it would look good 👍 and then it would work but you don’t know if it’s the right thing for the new one you just know it’s the wrong 😑 it’s a bad phone 📱 it’s a new thing it’s the same for different every day but it doesn’t look 👀 and I think 🤔 so it’s not a good 👍 but it works so it’s different so it’s different for the new phone 📱 and it doesn’t have to work on it doesn’t matter to the same for you know it’s just the one ☝️ but it doesn’t have the one that I can do a lot better and I can just use my new one ☝️ but it is not that the new iPhone 📱 so you have the one that’s the other is that I have the same thing and it’s the same phone 📱 but I have to get the new iPhone 📱 I just want it and then you have a good 😊 and it’s a different number so it’s just like 👍 so it’s just one ☝️ but you know it’s not like 👍 I have the new iPhone 📲 so you know it’s just one ☝️ so it’s a little more than just the one ☝️ and it will get the new phone 📞 so it’s just easier and cheaper for the money 💴 but it won’t cost 💲 much more to pay 💰 off your car 🚘 than to get the phone 📱 for the next two weeks weeks or even two years to to have the car car 🚘🚘 fixed so it’s easier and quicker and I will be happy 😆 I’m happy happy 😊 I’m so excited excited 😊 thank y all and I will talk soon 🔜 and have you have an update as to the results soon 🔜 thank ya again so far hope all goes all are good 😌 hope to be in your class today love ❤️ and have you been in your dreams hope all your day too bye ✌️
Rizz
Are you a basketball hoop? 'Cause I want to put my balls in you.
Are you a photo biographer? 'Cause I can picture us together.
rizz
are you a biographer cause i picture us toghether can i take a picture of you for i can show santa what i want for christmas No pen No paper you still draw my attention you know what i hate about math they always talk about x and y but not about u and i
My grandma used to beat the hell out of me for coming home late.. Guess who's late now..
Two Indians talk over a long distance using smoke signals. In the middle of the conversation, a nuclear bomb explodes behind one of them and a huge cloud of smoke rises silently into the sky. The other Indian signals with smoke: "Not so loud"
ching chong kading dong.
( my best words ever used ) .
85% of us are good at school while the other 15% is good at suicide
( teach me your ways 15% )
@everyone.. whats so funny is that JIT thinks hes so "cool" and that everyone is "amazed" about him hating on people who is wayyy above him on the roster. the pathetic part is that he hates on everyone elses family nd relationships when 100% of us have a WAYY better one then he will ever deserve. he was born pathetic, and will die pathetic. so JIT please tell me what its like to be such a coward?
Anybody can use this:)
Slow and steady wins the race but it won't fix ur ugly face 😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣
