Why couldn't the toilet cross the road?
Answer: 'Cause it got stuck in the crack.
Transportation Jokes
What has two wheels and goes really fast?
A vegetable down a hill.
What do you call a blind person driving a car?
Died.
I wish we could implant all parts because I could have used some car parts from Stephen Hawking after he died.
I thought opening a door for a lady was good manners, but she just screamed and flew out of the plane.
The convoy truckers are a joke.
Why did the turtle start flying? He was on a jet.
Yo momma so fat, when she gets in an elevator, it HAS to go down!
Daughter: Hey Dad, can I use your car?
Dad: Sure, but first you have to give me a blow job."
Daughter: Okay, (proceeds to service dad). Dad, ewww, your dick tastes like shite!"
Dad: Oh, that's right, I lent your brother the car.
What did one tower say to the other?
Damn, you looking PLANE!
The Christian, the Buddhist, and the Muslim each go on a separate plane.
The Christian's and the Buddhist's flight goes well, but the Muslim's plane has a problem and crashes into two towers.
Put a kid in a wheelchair in the Twin Towers. Damn, I love Hot Wheels!
How many hookers fit in a Cadillac?
About 4 in the trunk if you stack 'em right.
I know a good airplane joke, but it will probably go over your head.
Twin Towers: "No, it won't."
It's not bad that my car doesn't beep when reversing.
The screams of the passers-by are enough for me!
Patient number 14 was diagnosed with stage 4 melanoma—a type of skin cancer. Pretty ironic how he travels. He went to terminal 14.
What do you call a train full of gum?
A chew chew train.
What's yellow and can't swim? A bus full of kids.
I really like those "driverless cars." I saw loads of them last week in the car park.
Why did I cross the road to might get hit by a car or a bus?
