My sister said, "LET'S GO TO PIZZA!" So, I went to the pizza shop with her and she replied, "We really only needed the car?"
When they were going around giving out brains and you thought they were saying "train," so you said, "No thanks, I’ll take the next one!" 🤣
A penis is driving a car when all of a sudden it gets hit by a car, what did the penis end up saying?
Aaaawwwww I got dicklash!
What is the difference between Madeleine McCann and a submarine?
They are both full of seamen and are at the bottom of the ocean.
What's the difference between the 44 out of the 45 people who died in the Yaroslavl crash and the nine people who died in the helicopter crash?
Only one was ever famous. Vasicek and Kobe Bryant were the champions.
So last night I went on a taxi and I showed them your photo. All they said was I could ride him, it would be expensive though, since from his eyebrows to hairline is at least £100.
Why did the frog cross the road to hop to his side, Bih?
What's white, yellow and goes 40 mph?
A train driver's egg sandwich.
Kaj je pomaranča rekla, ko jo je povozil avto?
- Why is that flight waiting at 30,000 feet height?
- One tire became flat. They are changing it in the middle of the journey.
I gave her a lift back to her crib because her car wouldn’t start.
I was on a plane and my mom said, "It's just a little turbulence."
And I said, "Mom, we just got on the runway!"
Q: If an electric train heads south, which way does the steam go?
A: No steam.
Why was the bus sleeping? Because it was too tired.
What do you call an autistic kid with a rocket ship? A cocker.
Is there anything worse than when it's raining cats and dogs? Yes, hailing taxis.
How do you hire a horse? Easy. Just put up a ladder.
What's the difference between a car and a car?
I have absolutely no idea, sorry.
Why is a rap boat like a dog?
They both get off sniffing assholes.
What did Rapboat's mom say to Rapboat?
"Is it in yet?"
