Transportation jokes
How many times does 50 fit into 9?
Get in a van and find out!
I remember my first day back when working at a camp. I was so surprised when the trains arrived.
Someone complimented my parking today! They left a sweet note on my windshield that said, “Parking fine.”
What does a gynecologist and delivery driver have in common?
Whenever they’re hungry, they can just scrape a little cheese off the top of the box.
Don’t have a bike? You can mount me instead.
What does an Asian say when his car tires burst on the highway?
"Some Ting Wheely Wong!"
Blind people driving on the highway would be the world's biggest, and shortest game of bumper cars!
Why couldn’t the orange cross the road? Because it ran out of juice.
Q: What’s yellow and can’t swim?
A: A bus full of children.
What is the difference between a hundred dead babies and a Ferrari?
I don't have a Ferrari in my garage!
You were born on the highway. That's where most accidents happen.
Q. How does an ISIS terrorist practice safe sex?
A. He marks the camels that kick.
What do you call a nun on a bike?
Virgin Mobile.
A girl in my class started barking, and I yelled out, "Furry!" Everyone started laughing at her, and I felt bad. After school, I asked to drive her home, and one the way there I apologized and then told her to count down from 10 - 1. Before she said one, I yelled, "THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!" then I jumped out the car.
What time is it when you get home, can you walk walk home, and walk walk home from school, and walk walk home from school, and walk walk home from school, and walk walk home from school, and walk walk home from school, and walk walk home from school, and walk walk home from school, and walk walk home from school?
Hi.
My departed uncle was a circus clown before he died.
So all his friends came in one car.
What’s yellow and can’t swim?
A bus full of children.
This is a 2 for 1 plane combo that will never exist.
But, it's like a plane pizza.
Nothing happens, but it terrorizes me.
My girlfriend got ran over by a bus. I lost my job as a bus driver.
When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.