Transportation jokes
Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?
He got ran over by a bus.
Why did I cross the road to might get hit by a car or a bus?
I can't tell what's farther, the Great Wall of China, or how far Paul Walker flew out of his windshield.
Yo mama so fat, when she put on a yellow raincoat people see her and yell "Hey yo, taxi!"
Trying to find a good parking spot is a lot like trying to find a girlfriend.
If you can’t find one, you stick it in the disabled spot and hope nobody finds out.
I hate sitting in traffic, I always get run over.
What's the difference between a submarine and Madeline McCann?
They are both full of seamen and at the bottom of the sea.
What do you call a Flying Pilot?
He pee on the plane.
Why do y’all call a pickup truck?
'Cause ya got a flat tire.
Wanna hear a plane joke? Nah, it'll just go over your head.
Q: What's yellow and floats?
A: A bus full of children.
If you give a man a plane ticket, he will fly for a couple of hours, but if you push a man out of a plane, he will fly for the rest of his life :)
(Bus Driver) What did you learn in school today?
(Kid) We learned that you are a sussy baka.
(Bus Driver) Oh yeah? Well, I quit!
(Kid) Quit what?
(Bus Driver) Living.
(Kid) But it was a joke!
(Bus Driver) Doesn't matter. I will die, but you will still be alive.
(Kid) Ok.
(Bus Driver) That was a joke, too!
Why can’t I drive? 'Cuz my dad never showed me how, yet.
Why can't a steam locomotive sit down?
Because it has a tender behind.
Why did the baby cross the road?
Because it was stapled to the chicken.
I want to die in my sleep, like grandpa did, not screaming and crying like the people on the bus he drove.
You know what I told my little brother plane?
What do you call a train full of gum?
A chew chew train.
I'll never forget my grandpa's last words:
"You need to park a little closer."