Transportation jokes
If you're serious, congratulations on getting this far in life with absolutely no comprehension of reality.
If you had this kind of knowledge about driving a car, you'd be sitting 30 feet away from it, throwing pieces of pickles at a barn and shouting ‘shazam’ into an empty iPhone case, wondering why the car wasn't moving.
"Ya tryna run? Hop in the van."
Why did the blonde stare at the Ford?
Because it said, "Focus."
Me: Opens the window to get some fresh air.
Everyone else on the plane: 😟...😱
Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
'Cause it got knocked down on its way.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
So it could get to the other side!
What do you call a bus full of white people?
A TWINKiE!!!
If you park your tow truck on the footpath, it'll get towed.
A man walks into a bar carrying a big chunk of asphalt and says to the bartender, “Make mine a double Scotch and one more for the road.”
My daughter came home from school later than usual. I was panicking, then at 5:30 p.m. she arrived, not walking but in a bus 🚌. I asked, "Where the hell did this bus come from?" She said, "The garage in the alleyway, Mama. I bought it for five gummies and eight buttons. You like her? She is called Belle Bus." My face was just: 😑 How did you get the bus here? She replies with a whisper, "I drove her through five gardens, a house, and two police cars!" 🙃 So that explains why you have handcuffs on. "Yeah!"
She needs a flat surface cleaner.
Why did the depressed kid jump off the bike? It was free depressed day.
What is a bus 🚌?
Why did the elephant cross the road?
To get to the peanut.
Driving on a road at night and hit a speed bump. Remember, there are no speed bumps... I hit Bambi!
You are so fat that when you wear a yellow raincoat, a running person behind you shouted, "Taxi!"
Yo mama so fat, when she went into an elevator, she had to go down.
They said I couldn't drive.
Now they know I can't cause they are all dead.
What did the pilots say before crashing into the Twin Towers?
"We can't go over it, we can't go under it, we go through it!"
A Chinese man and an Indian man are in a car. Who’s driving?
A woman.