Worst Jokes Ever
What did the Titanic say while sinking?
"It's going down."
What is a geographical discovery? Little Johnny found his geography homework undone.
As a son, I like sports, and I watch sports with my mom. So one day, we were looking at football. My mom asked me who makes the most money. I said the quarterback.
My mom told me I'm going to get a quarterback as my new boyfriend, and it'll be your new stepfather. A week later, my mom went out. I came home, and I see my mom making out with a high school kid. I said, "What's going on?" My mom said, "Look, my new boyfriend and new stepfather is the high school quarterback." My mom said, "See, mission accomplished." I said, "Yeah, job well done."
What's a fetus' favorite gun? A micro SMG.
Why can't orphans eat chips?
'Cause they're family sized!
My father touched me yesterday. I called him a priest.
What's Christian and holey?
JFK.
In a game, there are crew members that have to keep the ship running. But little did they know, there was an imposter among them.
Sound familiar? 🤔
Well, in September 11th...
What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.
What's pink and rusty? Madeline McCann's bike.
What do you call a bunch of bald paki in a swimming pool? Coco pops.
I saw a little boy playing alone in the street. I told him that was a bad idea, then asked for his parents.
God, orphanages are fun to work at!!
Bro, yo goofy ahh hairline lookin' like a rhombicosidodecahedron.
Your hairline is so bad, it's not even McDonald's, it's Dixy Chicken!
If you play the movie "Jaws" in reverse, it's a heartwarming story about a shark who gives arms and legs to disabled people.
Are you a highway? Because I wanna lay on you.
What do you call a Chinese boy throwing poo?
Yung Flung Dung.
I punched an orphan and told him to go back to his parents and tell them about it... Oh, wait.
So I told an orphan to slap themselves until they are wanted. I came back the next day to see them slapping themselves. Then I stopped them and told them to punch themselves.
The next day I saw a dead orphan.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
A-lick-a-lot-of-puss.
How do you know when it's bedtime in the Netherlands?
When the big hand touches the little hand.