Worst Jokes Ever
A kid asks his father, "How long is our trip, Dad?"
The kid's father says, "Our trip is a Fortnite."
Came across the headline this morning whilst reading the paper...
"Woman beats off Rapist in carpark!"
I suppose that was a fair compromise!
Canada being the most educated country in the world is bemusing, considering that Canadians cannot spell "legalise" and "programme" correctly.
Oh, and most of them do not realise that it's day-month-year, NOT month-day-year.
Joe mama so fat when she got sturdy, she tripped on her shoelaces, fell on her face, and fell down 2 floors.
Yo mama so fat, she eats with three utensils: a knife, spoon, and a forklift.
What does an orphan wish they could do?
Wish happy Mother's Day and Father's Day.
What's the difference between jam and jelly?
You can't jelly your dick into someone's asshole.
Wife: I’m pregnant.
Husband: Hi pregnant, I’m dad.
Wife: No, you’re not.
How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb? None, they can't change anything.
I am just kidding, you know gay jokes aren't funny, come on guys.
I once had a pet snake, exactly 3.14 meters.
He was a great πthon.
Your hairline is so bad, it's not even McDonald's, it's Dixy Chicken!
Bisexuals aren’t gay.
Bisexuals aren’t straight.
They’re graight! 😂
If Jesus told you to trust everyone, that must be why there are a lot of kidnappings.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to Birds Eye.
I went up to a priest and asked if he participated in NNN. He replied, "How can I, with all these people calling me daddy?"
Disabled man stands up.
Blind man: “You can stand?”
Deaf man: “You can see?”
Mute man: “You can hear?”
Disabled man: “You can talk?”
Doctor: “What the actual fuck?”
Other doctor: “FUCK THIS, I QUIT!”
I will never forget my mother and father's last words.
"Where the Sam hell did you get a grenade?"
What do my little brother and a vagina have in common?
They both ooze blood 🩸 when punched.
So, I met Michael Jackson before he died. He dragged me to his bed.
I used to be a banker...
But then I lost interest.