Worst Jokes Ever
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Atch.
Atch who?
Sorry you are sneezing. Have you got a cold?
A guy goes to Starbucks and asks, "Hey, if I can make you laugh, I don’t have to pay." The girl in the window says, "Okay." The guy says, "A little boy named Timmy lost his arms." The girl says, "Oh no!" The guy says, "And his dad left him when he was 4." The girl says, "Uhh yeah." The guy says, "Okay, I guess I’ll be paying then." The girl asks, "Okay, and what name will that be under?" The guy says, "Timmy, I’m Timmy."
A kid asks his father, "How long is our trip, Dad?"
The kid's father says, "Our trip is a Fortnite."
From your Dad.
I won’t be back for a while, it’s a very long line.
Where do walls shop?--Walmart.
My mom always said garlic powder makes everything better, so I sprinkled some on my divorce papers and my wife's broken leg.
Why couldn't the orphan get an Android? Because it didn't have a home button.
Why can't Asian people use a telephone?
Because they might wing the wrong number.
Why do orphans like boomerangs?
A: Because they come back, unlike their parents.
What's the difference between a newborn baby and an orphan after a rugby match?
They both come out bloody and crying, but at least one gets picked up.
What's the difference between an orphan's parents and his boomerang?
One of them actually came back.
What do you call a bowling ball that falls from the sky and knocks down all the bowling pins?
An airstrike.
What does an orphan wish they could do?
Wish happy Mother's Day and Father's Day.
I need a hug.
*hugs train*
Is that ass a water barrier 'cause dam[n]?
I visited my friend at his new house. He told me to make myself at home.
So I threw him out. I hate having visitors.
My birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.
Spongebob's teeth upside down is the twin towers.
Spongebob: 9 letters
Squarepants: 11 letters
Spongebob did 9/11.
This is a 2 for 1 plane combo that will never exist.
But, it's like a plane pizza.
Nothing happens, but it terrorizes me.
Can two high-femme lesbians go on a date with each other?
Yes, but it will take them forever to get ready.