Worst Jokes Ever

If you're depressed and you're crying, like this joke.

Your forehead is so big, your face is on your chin.

There are people who are beautiful, and then there are people whom I won't rape.

Why did the silly girl put sugar under her pillow?

She wanted to have sweet dreams. 😂

What place has more boys than the Catholic Church? Michael Jackson's bedroom.

Teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime.

Teach a feminist to fish and she will accuse you of patronising her, claim she knew how to do it anyway, and that even if she didn’t, she could easily work it out without the help of a man.

This is a joke to tell to someone with you or something. SOMEONE will laugh. Say: "This word isn't gonna be funny until I tell you, your probably not going to laugh." *your friend* "what's the word?" *you* "finger" *friend* *dies of laughter*. *note* it works better if you wiggle your finger or something before and not everyone laughs, so don't feel bad if they don't. Also, don't be surprised if you get put in jail for murder, because you're going to kill someone with this.

I will pay someone to kill me.

I'm 24 and I was with a Chinese lady, and she kept screaming, "I'm too young!" Like, I don't know what that name is.

Me: My girlfriend broke up with me yesterday, and I had her wheelchair.

Me: Guess who came crawling right back?

What's black and white and red all over? The prisoner I just hit with my car.

What do you get when you put 50 lawyers in a room with 50 lesbians? One hundred people who don't do dick.

Why are the Americans good at Rubik's cubes? Because they have a long history of separating colors.

I bet for Halloween you were a Goblin. How about you gobble deez nuts?

The difference between my life and a joke is that a joke has meaning.

What did the lesbian vampire say to the heterosexual woman after she was done licking her pussy after she was done having her blood period?

"I will be back next month."

"So I asked a genie if he could grant me this wish. I wished to be like Michael Jackson. The next day, I was in a playground full of little kids."

My girlfriend's a porn star.

She'd kill me if she found out.

Yo hairline be lookin' like Elmo's toe fungus.

Balls in your jaws.