Worst Jokes Ever
Why can’t you trust an emo kid?
'Cause they always leave you hanging.
I'd tell you a joke about my boyfriend's dick, but it's a private joke.
Why couldn't the twins never do anything right?
Because they were triplets!
You’re so short you would need a lift to kiss your bride.
Why was the director injured?
He couldn't find the right cast!
Bf: Babe, do you love me?
Gf: Of course, why do you ask?
Bf: I heard that your mom passed away, and I went to pick some roses for you to try to cheer you up, and then I remembered why I went to the garden.
1, 2, 3, 4, 5. I'm old enough to drive, for now I'm still alive, till I crash in that beehive!
Why were the apple and orange all alone? Because the banana "split."
What fruit is square and green? A lemon in disguise.
What did one bee say to the other bee?
"I love you, honey!"
What's the most confusing day of the year for an illegitimate kid?
Father's Day.
I see 6 letters in "the past."
I have 2020 vision.
I see 7 letters in "the future," I have 2021 vision.
I was walking home, then I saw a "Wait" sign. A man came and took me. I'm still waiting for him to ask for a lesson.
VVD [is] better than Sergio Ramos.
What do you call a Jedi teacher who lives in a forest?
Obi-Wan Canopy
Pickled carrots.
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
They don’t know where home is.
Who did a barber win a race?
He knew a short cut.
Well, I didn’t get as high as I wanted to, but I’m high enough that if I fall I’d probably break something.
Q: Who are the fastest readers in the world?
A: 9/11 victims. They went through 89 stories in 7 seconds.