What was the last thing to run through osama bin ladens mind? Probably a bullet.
Is Depression an emotion or a state of mind? I call it a lifestyle
A woman gets rid of polish with chemicals and no one bats an eye The Germans got rid of polish with chemicals and everyone lost their mind
Do you want to hear a money joke? Never mind it makes no cents
What do you call a broken pencil never mind it’s pointless!!
I told the doctor I didn’t want a brain surgery. But he changed my mind.
Knock knock. Who’s there? Broken pencil. Broken pencil who? Never mind, it was pointless!
Why were Abraham Lincoln and John F Kennedy very wise presidents?
They both had an open mind.
Are you suicide, cause you’re always on my mind
It’s the World Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat right next to the pitch. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone will be sitting there. ‘No,’ says the neighbor. ‘The seat is empty.’ ‘This is incredible,’ said the man. ‘Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Final and not use it?’ The neighbor says, ‘Well actually the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first World Cup Final we haven’t been to together since we got married.’ ‘Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that. That’s terrible….But couldn’t you find someone else, a friend, relative or even a neighbor to take her seat?’ The man shakes his head. ‘No,’ he says. ‘They’re all at the funeral.’
Why do women have cleaner minds than men? – Because they change theirs more often.
JFK was one of the most open-minded presidents. It really blows my mind how great he was.
Sir, I mustache you a question… Ah, never mind, I’ll just shave it for later.
I see some objects over there… oh never mind, that’s a woman.
Cashier: Will you want the milk in a bag today sir?
Customer: I’ll just keep it in the carton if you don’t mind.
Three nuns are on their way up to heaven after having been involved in a terrible minibus crash on the Italian Alps that killed them and the driver (he went the other direction!) As they’re approaching the Pearly Gates to be interview by St. Peter, they are requested by an attendant to form a single line and wait. Sister Agnes is first, Sister Bernadette behind her and Sister Carmel on the end. Finally, St. Peter approaches the nuns to determine their worthiness for entry to Heaven. He says to the first nun : “Sister Agnes, have you ever seen the penis of a man”? Sister Agnes bursts into tears and says : Yes, St. Peter, I have, but please don’t let this prevent me from entering the Kingdom of Heaven". St. Peter says : “Never fear, my child. Say a thousand Hail Marys and then go over to that font of Holy Water and wash your eyes out, then you shall enter the Kingdom of Heaven”. Sister Carmel sees what’s going on and taps Sister Bernadette on the shoulder, somewhat urgently. “Pssst - hey Bernie”!, she says. Sister Bernadette asks : “What is it?” A little annoyed. Sister Carmel says : “Do you mind if we swap places”? Sister Bernadette replies : “What for”? Sister Carmel says : “Well, I wouldn’t mind gargling before you stick your ass in there”!
what was the last thing to go through Jfk’s mind? A Bullet
Justin: Hey Josh: Hey man Justin: Why only “man”? Josh: It feels weird saying the r a c e y names Justin: I don’t mind. Josh: okay S L A V E Justin: oh no not T H A T one
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Seven’s been worried about six even since he left Afghanistan. Every time 6 closes his eyes, he sees the war and hears the gunshots. He sees the blood, the killing, the death, and soldiers falling. When he looks at seven, he remembers when they were forced to eat their own flesh to not starve in those caves. He sees the war and the flashbacks will come back forever, burned into his soul and mind.
What was the last thing that crossed Princess Diana’s mind? The steering wheel.