Darkness

Nellie

Why were Abraham Lincoln and John F Kennedy very wise presidents?

They both had an open mind.

Bullet

Anonymous

What was the last thing to run through osama bin ladens mind? Probably a bullet.

6

Puns

Anonymous

I told the doctor I didn’t want a brain surgery. But he changed my mind.

Depression

Donde Shakur

Is Depression an emotion or a state of mind? I call it a lifestyle

5

Depression

Nothing

Are you depression 'cause you’re always on my mind~

Puns

Broken pencil

Knock knock. Who’s there? Broken pencil. Broken pencil who? Never mind, it was pointless!

0

OH

The Inspector

Stephen Hawkings is sooo lucky to go to heave- Oh never mind, here comes the stairway.

Puns

Anonymous

Do you want to hear a money joke? Never mind it makes no cents

JFK

Jasper

what was the last thing to go through Jfk’s mind? A Bullet

Depression

Anonymous

Are you suicide, cause you’re always on my mind

9

Baseball

aye

It’s the World Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat right next to the pitch. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone will be sitting there. ‘No,’ says the neighbor. ‘The seat is empty.’ ‘This is incredible,’ said the man. ‘Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Final and not use it?’ The neighbor says, ‘Well actually the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first World Cup Final we haven’t been to together since we got married.’ ‘Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that. That’s terrible….But couldn’t you find someone else, a friend, relative or even a neighbor to take her seat?’ The man shakes his head. ‘No,’ he says. ‘They’re all at the funeral.’

German

Anonymous

A woman gets rid of polish with chemicals and no one bats an eye The Germans got rid of polish with chemicals and everyone lost their mind

School

Smart one kendal

What do you call a broken pencil never mind it’s pointless!!

Russian

friend

My friend loves playing Roulette, so I figured I would introduce him to Russian Roulette. Blew his mind.

Nut

ok this isnt a joke but its funny.

Roses are red, nuts are brown, Skirts go up, pants go down. Body to body, skin to skin, when its stiff, stick it in. It goes in dry, comes out wet, the longer it’s in, the stronger it gets. It comes out dripping and starts to sag, its not what you think, its a lipton tea bag.

Get your mind out of the gutter.

JFK

Anonymous

JFK was one of the most open-minded presidents. It really blows my mind how great he was.

Baby

Dark_Shadow

Do you have dark humor?

Actually never mind, I was going to tell you a joke about babies dying… but I decided to abort.

Marriage

Anonymous

Why do women have cleaner minds than men? – Because they change theirs more often.

Nothing

Anonymous

To everyone saying “don’t joke about suicide, it’s not even funny to laugh about people dying”. Do you think we have it easy?? Have you ever thought these jokes were helping us to cope? Mind your own business and don’t make assumptions on people you know nothing about, please and thanks.

Titanic

Punz

The Titanic, just like my phone IT JUST WON’T SYNC

Edit: Never mind it started to sync…