What was the last thing to run through osama bin ladens mind? Probably a bullet.

Is Depression an emotion or a state of mind? I call it a lifestyle

A woman gets rid of polish with chemicals and no one bats an eye The Germans got rid of polish with chemicals and everyone lost their mind

Do you want to hear a money joke? Never mind it makes no cents

Are you suicide, cause you’re always on my mind

I told the doctor I didn’t want a brain surgery. But he changed my mind.

Are you suicide, cause you’re always on my mind.

It’s the World Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat right next to the pitch. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone will be sitting there. ‘No,’ says the neighbor. ‘The seat is empty.’ ‘This is incredible,’ said the man. ‘Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Final and not use it?’ The neighbor says, ‘Well actually the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first World Cup Final we haven’t been to together since we got married.’ ‘Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that. That’s terrible….But couldn’t you find someone else, a friend, relative or even a neighbor to take her seat?’ The man shakes his head. ‘No,’ he says. ‘They’re all at the funeral.’

What do you call a broken pencil never mind it’s pointless!!

Knock knock. Who’s there? Broken pencil. Broken pencil who? Never mind, it was pointless!

Why were Abraham Lincoln and John F Kennedy very wise presidents?

They both had an open mind.

JFK was one of the most open-minded presidents. It really blows my mind how great he was.

Are you depression 'cause you’re always on my mind~

Why do women have cleaner minds than men? – Because they change theirs more often.

I see some objects over there… oh never mind, that’s a woman.

Stephen Hawkings is sooo lucky to go to heave- Oh never mind, here comes the stairway.

what was the last thing to go through Jfk’s mind? A Bullet

Sir, I mustache you a question… Ah, never mind, I’ll just shave it for later.

if someone calls you dirty minded just say

You are dirty minded as well if you understand what im saying

There was a car accident and the cops pull up to the crime seen to start asking people questions. The police started talking to a blonde lady and said what happened here she responded by saying a car crash. They then asked but how did it happen, she responded the cars crashed into each other. They finally said but why did it happen. The lady said oh i know where your going with this. It happened because when cars push on the gas peddle the car goes forward and they both pushed it so they both went forward and hit each other. One cop said never mind ma’m and they stared walking away. The blonde lady then said oh and officers my computer froze do you think i should put in the microwave or in the oven?

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