Why can't orphans have sex?
Because they have nobody to call "daddy."
Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call an orphan in a wheelchair running into fire?
Hot wheels.
What do you call a person that can't operate a wheelchair?
Stephen Hawking.
Why was the chicken screaming?
He had an egg stuck in his butt.
My mom bought me a car, and she called me an ungrateful b*tch because I sat in my wheelchair the whole time.
Why can't orphans play sports?
They don't know what a home team is.
I bet my friend $5 that he would drown in the lake.
... It was a bittersweet victory.
You know they're lying when they say, "My mom's picking me up."
In 1492 Christopher Columbus sailed the ocean blue.
He sat on a rock, tickled his cock, until it turned red, white, and blue!
"Jack Sparrow."
"Captain, Captain Jack Sparrow!"
Why did the teacher yell at the orphan?
Because he didn’t do his homework.
Welcome to Joe's abortion clinic! No fetus can beat us! You make 'em, we take 'em!
I made a joke about putting babies in the microwave and got told I was a disgusting person.
So from now on I’ll only make baby in the deep fryer jokes.
Guys, can we change pride month to another month, please? My birthday is in June, and I'm not gay, and my friends keep making fun of me. I think we should change it to March because my brother's birthday is in March, and that'd be funny.
Are you a train because I want to get railed by you? ;)
You’re so fat; if you go outside now, you’d be arrested for breaking social distancing guidelines.
Why was the orphan eating cereal with water? Because he has no dad to bring him milk.
What do clothes and emo kids have in common?
They both get hung.
I asked my dad, "Are we there yet?" and he told me, "Don't worry, son, it will be a short ride!"
So I had an idea: you and a friend go bar (pub (whatever you call it)) hopping and propose to said friend in each one so everyone buys you free drinks and you get drunk and have a great time.