Worst Jokes Ever

Pineapple turnover.

Hello, I'm C-3PO. And this is my brother, WD-40.

A few days ago, I phoned up the spiritual leader of Tibet, and he sent me a large goat with a long neck. Turns out I phoned Dial-a-Llama.

I find it difficult to count to ten in French: un, deux, trois, quatre, cinq, six, sept.

I can't say the next one because I have a "huit" allergy.

My parents said they had to make a lot of sacrifices in order to pay for my education.

They were both druids.

I don't really trust the press. Sometimes they wear badges that say "press," but if you press those badges, they just fall over, all surprised.

I went out to buy some camouflage shirts the other day. Couldn't find any.

I was at a concert in the front row, and I shouted something to the band's guitarist. He took it the wrong way and responded: "I'm going to go down there and hit you with my guitar!"

And I replied: "Is that a death fret?"

A Chelsea fan called Timo Werner on his phone to encourage him during his bad form. Timo Werner still missed all the calls.

Hi guys, I'm back! So I have a question for you. What is red and smells like blue paint? Type in comments what you came up with.

If there's a guy without legs, he begins to hear boss music when a stack of shelves appear.

I think I am a boomerang because I always come back to you.

Why are all fat people bad drivers?

They are all hungover.

Prince, don't die! Just don't! Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaasse!

I'll give you an A because you're awesome.

B because you're beautiful.

A C because you're caring.

And I'll give you this D cuz you deserve it.

Bye!

Eschew obfuscation.

An Autistic chef made hamburgers out of donkey meat.

He called them: “ASPERGER’S”

You know that your grades are bad when you get a 66% on a test and your grade goes up.

Yo momma's so short that she fell off the toilet and broke her leg.