They're jokes

I have some jokes about popcorn.

Nah, they're too corny.

What does the Catholic Church and Worstjokesever.com have in common?

They're both full of child groomers.

Q: Why don't Indians play soccer?

A: Because every time they're in the corner, they open a store.

Why are Americans so good at solving Rubik's Cubes?

Because they're good at separating colors.

What does a deaf person do when they hear people scream? I don't know; it's not like they're gonna hear it anyway.

I went home and I saw my friend kissing my sister. I said, "What’s going on?" They both told me that they’re going out with each other. I said, "Alright."

The next morning, I see my friend kissing my mom. I said, "What’s going here?" They both told me they’re going out with each other. Then my friend said to me, "I gave you 3 gifts. 1 gift, I’m your best friend. 2 gift, I’m your new brother-in-law. 3 gift, I’m your new stepfather." I felt so happy I had a friend that [is] looking out for me.

If you ever have a gay friend whose comatose, tell his family he/she was a fruit. Now he/she's a vegetable, at least they're still in the produce section.

Did you hear about the band Manhole? I hear they're a metal cover.

Why don’t coffins have Wi-Fi?

Because they don’t want people to be so ‘connected’ while they’re trying to rest in peace.

Why can't orphans get five stars in GTA?

Because they're not wanted.

Why does no one sit next to a cheetah during school? Because they're a big cheetah.

Two Native Americans

Unwittingly walk into a gay bar and sit down to order a pitcher of beer. As they're sitting there sucking back on their ale, a gay guy walks up and says, "How would you boys like a blow job?"

The one Indian stands up and decks the guy, knocking him unconscious. He then sits back down and finishes his beer.

His buddy looks over and says, "Hey Joe, what did you do that for?"

Joe replies, "Not sure but it was something about getting a job!"

You know what's crazy? Is that the low taper fade, like, meme, is still MASSIVE. Still MASSIVE. Like, I'm still seeing like, new ones, that I've never seen before, and they're getting millions of likes and millions of views.

"Lettuce" stop making vegetable puns. We don't carrot all about them and they're not a-peas-ing.

Why don't amputees ever get cold? They're always wearing their stump warmers.

How do you know you’re at a gay cookout? They’re putting your sausage between two buns.

Why are orphans so naughty at school? It's not like the teacher is gonna call their parents.

If a blind person can’t see, then do they sleep?

They’re the night watchers while people who see sleep.

Emos,

They're always a cut above the rest.

Did you know Disney is making a movie for suicidal people?

They're calling it Finding Emo.