Technology jokes
Stephen Hawking went bankrupt after he found out somebody in his house was costing him way too much money on electricity bills.
He just couldn’t figure out who.
Y'all, I'm suspended till Wednesday and can't do much cuz I'm on a tablet, not my computer. Tell autterpop I won't be on till Wednesday or after.
Uber driver: .........
Me: .........
Uber driver: .........
Me: 5 stars.
I got a call from NASA. They’ve reached your hairline.
What is an astronaut's favorite letter on a keyboard?
SPACE.
Don’t fart in an Apple Store.
It has no Windows.
American: How do you use a PC?
Amish: We use a potato.
Why did Steven Hawkins die?
Because he got a virus.
What kind of mask are you wearing?
An Elon Musk!
How does a kid with no arms or legs like a video on YouTube when they say smash the like button?
They literally smash the like button "uuuuuugghghhhgBANG!"
How can you tell if a heterosexual man has been using a computer?
There is sperm on the screen.
Why are elephants scared of computers?
Because of the mouse.
Where do you take Stephen Hawking when he dies?
The Apple repair store.
What do you call a male robot who wants to be a girl?
A trans-former.
When you get suspended from school for giving the deaf kid AirPods for his birthday.
Why don't churches have WiFi?
They can't compete with an invisible force that actually works.
Battery 1%.
I take one last look at Earth as my suit runs out of power.
Sometimes I get jealous when my phone dies.
It's just been discovered that as well as writing a book, Adolf Hitler also wrote one of the first computer games, "Mein Kraft."
I hope Stephen Hawking was an organ donor, 'cause I need some parts for my go-cart.