Technology jokes
Stephen Hawking isn't actually dead. He is just having an update.
If you are a robot, you cannot talk.
I saw a robbery at the Apple store.
Am I an iWitness?
What happens when Stephen Hawking wakes up from his sleep?
"Log in."
What does Earl Bradley and an Xbox have in common?
They both get turned on by children.
A man bought a brand new iPhone but returned it, why?
The apple was already bitten.
Why can orphans have a phone? Because they can find the home button.
I was being interviewed by Elon Musk. He asked, "Where are you from?" and I said Portugal. He replied, "So you are a fellow countryman of a Pen merchant whose freekick ball broke my rover on Mars. Get out!!" Tears ran down my face. Shame on you, Penaldo, for costing me my dream job!
Why should you never fart in an Apple store?
Because they have no Windows!
Why is there no invitation to an internet party for those with laptops? Everyone can get in.
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair?
RC-XD
What can a mouse do?
He clicks.
If you're ever bored, pee on an android. Apple is better!
I just heard that the inventor of the autocorrect died the other day.
May he rest in pizza.
I don't know what an HD is, but my doctor says I have 80 of 'em'.
Where does Stephen Hawking get his computer fixed?
At PC World.
What do Stephen Hawking and a walkie talkie have in common?
Joe Mama is so fat that when she sat on an iPhone, it turned into an iPod.
Approached (DYM 100).
If anyone ever makes a time machine, please make a bunker for Hitler/the Nazis and send them to 2050. I want to see who would die first, future us or them.