Skill jokes

My friend is an amazing hacker. He cut down 23 trees already.

What do you call a pig who knows karate?

A pork chop.

How did black people learn to steal sports cars?

By playing GTA nonstop.

Why are orphans bad at baseball? They can't get home.

Why are the UK and the USA bad at playing chess?

Because they lost 2 towers and their queen.

What do you call a blind photographer? A waste of money.

I went for a job interview today, and the manager said, "We're looking for someone who is responsible."

"Well, I'm your man," I replied. "In my last job, whenever anything went wrong, they said I was responsible!"

I saw a bus the other day with some boy scouts at the back. One of them was having fun getting his knot-tying badge.

Why aren't orphans good at poker?

Because they don't know what a "full home" is!

How did the carpenter do on his interview? He nailed it!

My ex-wife misses me, but her aim is getting better.

There's only 3 types of people: the ones who can count and the ones that can't.

Suck all the bread!

Why do orphans suck at baseball? Because they never could play catch.

I'm great at multitasking. I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.

Q: Why can't pilots play Jenga?

A: Because they will just hit the Twin Towers.

Q. Why couldn't Terri Schiavo give good blow jobs?

A. She didn't know how to swallow.

Why are Germans so good at cleaning?

They have experience in ethnic cleansing.

Here are some skeleton jokes.

You know the average person tries too hard and works himself to the bone.

If that joke didn't tickle your funny bone, I can give you a real humorous joke.

I used to play the trumpet, now I play the xylo-bone.

I'm always happy; nothing gets under my skin.

I made you some turkey for lunch. Bone appetit!

I'm glad I had you; I'm no longer bonely.

I've got a skele-ton of more jokes, but I'm just giving you one more.

Did you hear about the skeleton ninja? He was very skullful (skillful)!

Lucas is bronze 1 in RL.