Shovel jokes
How do you make a body disappear?
You use an axe, black plastic bags, a forest, a shovel, and some ice cream because killing someone and chopping them up and digging holes in the ground and putting dirt over them is a lot of hard work!
P.S., I'm joking and don't condone these actions.
Do you have a shovel in your back pocket?
Why?
'Cause I’m digging that ass.
Why did the rapper bring a shovel to the concert?
Because he was about to BURY the COMPETITION!
So, if being a paedophile is a career, then burying the bodies must be gardening.
My fifth wife asked me to help her dig in the garden. Here we go again.
Bean.
I have a friend named Mole.
She plays a game called "sandbox" to dig up dirt...
Why did the rapper bring a shovel to the concert?
To dig deep with his lyrics.
My mom gave me a golden shovel and a hoe. I said, "Why do I need this?" She said, "That you every year."
Why did the rapper bring a shovel to the studio?
Because he was digging for those UNDERGROUND BEATS!
Beans
Why did the orphan dig six feet under?
To find his parents.
What's the difference between a broken shovel and a young child?
The shovel doesn't cry when you swing it into a wall repeatedly.
What’s better than swinging a dead baby in circles over your head with a 5 foot rope?
Stopping it with a shovel.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef.
My friend has a shovel made of gold. I guess you could call him a gold digger.
My four conditions:
1. I need coffee.
2. I need vacation.
3. I need food.
4. I need tape, axe, saw, bag, shovel, and an alibi.
I was outside digging a six-foot hole when I found a treasure box with jewels and shiny gems! I almost went inside to tell my wife, then I remembered why I was digging the hole.
I was digging a hole in the garden until I found some coins! I was about to tell my mum when I remembered I was digging a hole in the garden.
I don't understand why in horror movies they make digging a grave look so easy. It usually takes me days.