Tool

Tool Jokes

Dad

I'll always remember my dad's last words... "Why do you have an axe? We live in the city!"

Pedophile

What type of file does it take to turn a 4 mm hole to a 44 mm hole?

A pedophile.

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  • Part

    Q: What's the best part about gardening?

    A: Getting down and dirty with your hoes.

    Abortion clinic

    What's worse than locking your keys in the car in front of an abortion clinic?

    Having to go back inside and ask to borrow a hanger.

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  • Shovel

    What did the guy exclaim after inventing the shovel?

    It is ground breaking!

  • 4
  • Friend

    What do friends and trees have in common? They both fall down when you hit them with an axe.

  • 0
  • Knife

    What is the difference between me and a knife?

    The knife has a point.

    Coat Hanger

    I'm not saying I hate you. I'm just saying that if I could go back in time, I'd give your mom a coat hanger.

    Uncle

    I will always remember my uncle's last words, "What's the shovel for?"

    Dad

    Why are most absent dads mechanics?

    They like to nut and bolt.