Short jokes
Why did my foot cross the road?
Because your ass was on the other side.
Yo mama so fat, when she passed by the TV, I missed a whole season of SpongeBob.
The devil's number is 346 because you will be in jail.
I just came across a pile of cash in the parking lot.
Usually I just use tissues.
What did Dom Toretto say about the tree Paul Walker hit?
"Family strong, but not that strong."
When is the only time Kamala Harris is using her head? When she is giving head.
My grandma unplugged the internet cable, so I unplugged her life support.
What is 6 inches and long?
A Slim Jim.
The man was dangling by a string!
I was jealous the day he died.
Hitler isn’t really a bad guy, after all, he did kill Hitler himself.
Once my sister was a sister, now she's a blister.
Why do orphans live in an orphanage?
Answer: Because they are wanted there.
What does 2016 and 2020 have in common?
A monkey caused worldwide outrage.
What is a pup's favorite pizza?
Pupperoni
Tell world's best yo mama joke to an orphan, then watch them cry.
So the man asks me, "Jesus, how do you want your steak?"
So I said, "Well done, my good faithful servant, well done."
Why is it you donate one kidney, you're a hero, but donate four or five and people run and call the police?
Why can't orphans sleep? Nobody can tuck them in.
My worst fear is being trapped in a lift with a man who is confident he can fix it.
Suicidal thoughts aren’t nice, but nor is life. So why not get them both done and over with?