Short jokes
Doctors in the Middle Ages, Plague doctor: "I must have some herbs to block out bad air."
Doctors now: "God, WTF were we doing back then?"
I would go suck some titties, but I’d rather die from being shot than cancer.
You know, the earth was flat till they buried your mama.
The wheelchair kid laughed at my test score, so I told him to stand up to the anthem.
A priest says to me, "Come up, my child." Then I said, "Do I know you? Because you're not my father."
How do you get a depressed kid out of a tree? You cut the rope.
Your hairline went back faster than your adoption papers!
Ok guys, I have one last joke (for now).
What do you call it when Panera is over?
Panera end.
Why is September 11th the best birthday?
Everyone remembers it! :)
Why does Darth Vader always choke people?
Because he wants them to feel what his Sith Lord does to him in bed.
What does Micheal Jackson and a rock have in common?
They are both hard.
Like and comment if you play Fortnite!
What did the pedestrian say after he saw the twin towers fell?
JENGA!!!!
A man comes home, and the wife says, "My ex just died by getting hit by a bus." And the husband said, "I lost my job as a bus driver."
Why is it that skinny men like fat women?
Because they need warmth in winter, and shade in summer.
Are you a playground? Because I want to put my kids in you.
So I told the officer, "I can't even walk when I'm sober."
What is Epstein's favorite piano chord?
A minor.
How do you make a blonde girl stop screaming in bed? Pull out of her.
Your hairline is pushed back farther than G.T.A. 6.