Short jokes

Short jokes

Coffin

What can Michael Jackson eat in his coffin?

Nothing, only brown bread, what they call it! 😂😂😂

Mama

Your mama's so fat, when she jumps in the pool, the water jumps out!

Orphan

Why did the orphan cry when the teacher yelled at him?

Because the teacher said, "Don't make me call your parents!"

Dog

We were so poor when we were kids, dad used to jerk off the dog to feed the cat.

Emo

What did the emo say before he crossed the road?

"Fuck my life."

Chess

In British chess I guess they play without a queen...

But in American chess they play without 2 towers.

Lie

What does Jesus have in common with Pinocchio?

They believe their own lies.

Difference

What's the difference between the Twin Towers and the people at the old folks home?

They both collapsed.

Difference

What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.

Grandmother

My dad went to go buy milk, but he walks as slow as my grandmother.

My grandmother is paralyzed in the legs.

Serial Killer

Why did the serial killer cross the road? To get to the victim's house.

Knock, knock. Who's there? The serial killer.

Rule

Grandpa said, "No phone near the table," so I said, "You're not allowed near the school."

Shit

What did one butt cheek say to the other?

"Together we can stop this shit!"

Pilot

What did the pilots say before crashing into the Twin Towers?

"We can't go over it, we can't go under it, we go through it!"