Short jokes
A gay couple and a lesbian couple are going to the airport, which one gets there first? The lesbian, duh, they get there "lickety-split."
What’s big, red, and eats rocks?
A big, red, rock eater.
Roses are red, I have a confession:
A man kills best friend after 10hrs anal sex session.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun? Glock 46.
What do you call cringe?
You.
Oooo, Gabriel Casey.
I made this game called Ligma. Say it, "Ligma."
Lick my balls.
You went to the bed store asking for a water bed. They put a pillow and sheets on the ocean.
What are Michael Jackson’s sexual pronouns? Hee hee!
I saw an orphan on the street. I said, "Where are your parents?" He cried and said, "My mum and dad died in a car crash!" 😆😆😂😂🤣
So my sis thinks she's so smart. She said, "You can finish this move ten minutes later. Go to sleep."
If a tree could be any animal, what would it be?
Answer: A dog because of its bark lol. 😀
Waiter says, "Sir, we ran out of ranch, so I had the boys in the back improvise. But don't worry... It has even more zip & twang to it!"
What did the cat say when he took his new car for a test drive?
"Meoooow!"
If two blind people meet, one of them says: "Long time, no see!"
Why was the sea so friendly? Because it gave a little wave.
Mom: I'm going to the shop. If someone is at the door, don't open it.
Me: Ok.
*Ring*
Me: Opens the door.
Oh sh*t!
Mom: Gets flip flop.
Why do orphans hate the letter F?
Because the F stands for the family that didn't want them.
If the teacher tells you to stand up if you're not gay and there's that one kid in the wheelchair.
What did the dad say to the kid?
"U got to be kidding me."