Short jokes
What's green and sings?
Elvis Parsley!
Teacher: Take a seat, class.
Wheelchair person: I've been in the seat.
I remember my uncle's last words:
"I don't think we're going shooting today."
Why did the grandmother put wheels on her rocking chair?
... she likes to rock and roll lol.
Why did people take Stephen Hawking's to the hospital when we should have took him to Curry's PC World?
How do you stop a skunk from smelling?
Hold its nose.
Worst joke ever.
I can't believe I got fired at the calendar factory. I mean... all I did was take a day off!
What's large, grey, and doesn't matter?
An irrelephant.
My short friend called me a scrub, even though he was the one below me.
What is the capital of Greece? -- About 10 dollars.
Muslims love to exaggerate, that's why they always blow things up.
BLM.
My friend put an action toy and called it Kobe and put it on a drone. I realized that my friend didn't know how to fly a drone.
What do you call a group of ethnically diverse disabled people?
Seasoned vegetables.
What is Julius Caesar’s favorite food?
Roman noodles.
What did the cookie say to the milk?
What’s up duud?
What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Mustang Challenger?
I don't have a Mustang Challenger in my garage.
The first thing a man looks at in a woman, is her heart.
The fact that her breasts block the view is not her fault.
Roses are red, the Jews are a cult.
I've practiced Metzitzah b'peh on adults.
Did you hear about the nun that got kicked out of the convent?
She got caught squatting on the cucumbers in the garden.