Short jokes
My Japanese friend told me a Pearl Harbor joke. I told him he bombed it.
I added Paul Walker on my Xbox, but all he does is sit on the dashboard.
Your mama so ugly, when Santa Claus came to her house and saw her, he said, "HO HO HOLY SHIT THAT'S ONE UGLY BITCH!"
What do you call a skeleton with a mask and a knife?
A heartless killer.
Did you hear about the Scottish man who murdered his wife?
He totally kilt her.
What happened when the American broke his arm?
He went broke.
Why do blondes wear tight skirts?
To keep their legs closed.
Confucius say, man who stand on toilet is high on pot.
Kobe was on fire before his death. He was on fire after too.
What do you call a cheap circumcision?
A rip off.
What is white, black, and blue all at the same time?
Barack Obama.
Why did nobody believe the little girl who got raped?
She said a monster attacked her.
Why do so many people hate Bill Cosby? I mean, all he did was have affairs with drunk, attention-seeking women. They literally begged for it.
How did the cheetah greet other animals?
Cheetah: "Nice to eat you."
Where do pedophiles go hunting?
Elementary schools.
Look at a bag of black grapes. See how dark they are? That’s how I like my men.
25 at a time.
What's green and smells like bacon?
Kermit's finger.
What's black and sits on the bottom of the stairs to the cellar?
Steven Hawking where the experiments went wrong.
What do you call it when a girl on her period goes swimming?
A blood bath.
Cunt.