Short jokes
When is a rapist safe around children?
When his plans are oven ready.
I lost my dog. I probably shouldn't have named him "rape."
What's a priest's favorite toy?
A mute little boy.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't wanna say this, but nobody cares about you.
You don't need a parachute to go skydiving. You only need a parachute to go skydiving twice.
Why don’t we just call blue balls a cummy ache?
Your mamma so fat she has to use the equator as her belt.
What’s the difference between a priest and target?
Nothing, they both have children’s pants half off.
So you know those people that commit suicide by hanging themselves? I guess they lost Hangman.
What do you call a mouse with sneakers?
Squeakers!
What’s the difference between a priest and acne? At least acne waits til the boy is 12 to come on his face.
What day is international terrorist day?
September 11th, 2001.
Have you heard of the new sequel to "The Exorcist"?
A woman hires the devil to get a priest out of her son.
Why can't orphans go big? When you go big, it's considered family size.
Don't you just hate when you have to eat cereal with water because your dad won't bring the fucking milk? Cause same.
Would love to pound Sterling with a 14 lb hammer.
Me: Can I get your mom's number?
Friend: Here you go:
Me: Ohh, strange, I already had it.
All of the people disliking this category are probably emo.
She wears short skirts, I wear t-shirts, and we're both getting sent home from school because it's distracting to boys, apparently.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to have a thrill with pills. Jack came down, fuck a clown, and the cum made them frown.