Short jokes
What’s Brock from Pokemon's favorite food?
Brockoli.
I am only familiar with 25 letters of the alphabet.
I don't know why.
Where do sheep go to shop? Shears.
A Mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "uno, dos..." *poof* ... He disappeared without a tres.
Guess how I got away from my mom saying I can't play Fortnite? I took my stuff and I ran to Iran.
What did the dalmatian dog say after he finished his meal?
"That hit the spot?"
What do you call a sleeping dinosaur? A dinosnore!
How can you save a depressed person from a tree?
You cut the rope.
Him: What's the difference between Incestry.com and Ancestry.com?
Her: What?
Him: Nothing, either way you will be dating your cousin.
If anyone's gonna be fuckin' my sister, it's gonna be ME!
What is purple, small, and rinsed off in a drainer?
A bunch of grapes! 🍇
I like my coffee the way I like jokes about my coffee, I don't.
Your hairline goes so far back it went back to when Earth was created.
Why do kids like Michael Jackson so much?
Because he's made out of plastic, and that's what toys are made out of! 😂
What did the lady say to Michael Jackson on the beach?
"Excuse me sir, but you're in my sun."
A brunette fought and didn't get raped.
A blonde thought and did get raped.
What is the strongest weapon in India?
The red button (this is a fact).
How many astronauts can you fit into a VW Bug? 11, 4 in the seats, seven in the ashtray.
Did you know that Americans fall out of both sides of the bed?
The only difference between my grandma and the Twin Towers is that they collapsed faster than my grandma.