Short jokes

Short jokes

Wordplay

Zelensky: I'm begging for Russian forces to withdraw from the whole of Ukraine.

Putin: Crimea river.

Detention

I got detention for giving an emo kid a glow stick... I tried to lighten his spirit.

Rock

What does Micheal Jackson and a rock have in common?

They are both hard.

Emo

What's the difference between an emo and a banana?

They both hang like apples.

Pledge

I broke up with my girlfriend because she wouldn't stand for the pledge. She was in a wheelchair.

Bus Driver

A man comes home, and the wife says, "My ex just died by getting hit by a bus." And the husband said, "I lost my job as a bus driver."

Massage

What is an Italian massage?

An Italian Catholic priest giving a blowjob inside the confessional booth during Lent.