Short jokes
The Statue of Liberty is French; she ain't even American. Deport that bitch!
Today sucked. My friend fell off a cliff, and I went to jail.
Did you hear about Fridgetair
Kelvinator?
There was a kid in a wheelchair. I put him on fire and called him Hot Wheels.
What does a cat say when it's angry?
- Stop stressing meowt!
Person 1: Somebody farted.
Person 2: No, all I can smell is your breath.
When a fat person wants to kill themselves, why are they so worried? The diabetes will get to them sooner or later!
A handicapped person and an orphan get into a fight. The orphan says, "At least I have two functional legs." The handicapped person says, "At least I have two functional parents."
Some people are such treasures that you sometimes just wanna bury them.
What has 2 legs and loves to play with little kids? The local priest.
What's the difference between a brand new Oldsmobile and a brand new Raping?
...Rape.
Not sure if the Twin Towers were destroyed or if they were just purposely demolished. 🖐️😀
Why is Stephen Hawking an organ donor?
Because he saved 200 computers!
Roses are red, give me some limes, boy dies after masturbating 42 times.
China wants their name on everything but the m.f. virus.
What is the worst part about making an Asian girl squirt?
She charges you for extra sauce!
Other girls be like, "I want a 6ft guy", meanwhile I want to be 6ft under. 😃👍
Why did the person take crayons to the bedroom?
To draw the curtains.
Oh well, I.H.N.! I.H.N.!! I.H.N.!!!
Japanese people are so cool and organized, they have their own ways of suicide.