Short jokes
I didn't trip and fall... I attacked the floor, and I believe I am winning :3
Who does an orphan play soccer with?
No one.
Why can’t the disabled kid live on the corner?
Because he’s disabled.
I know I've changed my name from tj to selfish king but know it's gunna be selfishking#781.
What is a girl's favorite song when they are on their period?
"Period, oh period, oww!"
Never hide something behind a bookshelf. It's the oldest trick in the book!
Why did the rapper become a carpenter?
To build some SOLID BARS.
How many optometrists does it take to change a light bulb?
One (flips lens) or two? One (flips another lens) or two?
Meaning behind the German flag: 🇩🇪 Black: culture Red: Beer Yellow: Sausage Blue: Winning world wars.
What do u call a Muslim praying: Allahu akbar.
A guy walks into a gun store and everything is half off. He looks at his son and says, "I didn't know back to school sales started yet."
What did Osama say after knocking over the Twin Towers?
He he he haw.
Conservatives hate Barack Obama and transgender people for the same exact reason.
They hate change.
I'm going to hang myself in the bathroom at school and put a note telling kids that I'm a piñata.
Old.
A teacher wanted to sing, so she did. This is what she said:
"You have no family, even though you're broker than me."
What Did Iran Say To Oman?
"Oh man, I ran out of ideas!"
How do you spell "I. P. With U?"
Best chick ever.
Call me at 6969696969.
I've thought about suicide, but there's always been a part of me that knows I wouldn't be able to live with the decision.